Blog on life

Who knows where thoughts come from...

2006-05-03T15:41:00.000-07:00

Email forward from Mom:

Herewith at this happy time of year, a few confessions from my beating heart: I have no freaking clue who Nick and Jessica are. I see them on the cover of People and Us constantly when I am buying my dog biscuits and kitty litter. I often ask the checkers at the grocery stores. They never know who Nick and Jessica are either. Who are they? Will it change my life if I know who they are and why they have broken up? Why are they so important?

I don't know who Lindsay Lohan is either, and I do not care at all about Tom Cruise's wife.

Am I going to be called before a Senate committee and asked if I am a subversive? Maybe, but I just have no clue who Nick and Jessica are.

If this is what it means to be no longer young. It's not so bad.

Next confession:
I am a Jew, and every single one of my ancestors was Jewish. And it does not bother me even a little bit when people call those beautiful lit up, bejeweled trees Christmas trees. I don't feel threatened. I don't feel discriminated against. That's what they are: Christmas trees.

It doesn't bother me a bit when people say, "Merry Christmas" to me. I don't think they are slighting me or getting ready to put me in a ghetto. In fact, I kind of like it. It shows that we are all brothers and sisters celebrating this happy time of year. It doesn't bother me at all that there is a manger scene on display at a key intersection near my beach house in Malibu. If people want a creche, it's just as fine with me as is the Menorah a few hundred yards away.

I don't like getting pushed around for being a Jew, and I don't think Christians like getting pushed around for being Christians. I think people who believe in God are sick and tired of getting pushed around, period. I have no idea where the concept came from that America is an explicitly atheist country. I can't find it in the Constitution, and I don't like it being shoved down my throat.

Or maybe I can put it another way: where did the idea come from that we should worship Nick and Jessica and we aren't allowed to worship God as we understand Him?

I guess that's a sign that I'm getting old, too.

But there are a lot of us who are wondering where Nick and Jessica came from and where the America we knew went to.

In light of the many jokes we send to one another for a laugh, this is a little different: This is not intended to be a joke; it's not funny, it's intended to get you thinking.

Billy Graham's daughter was interviewed on the Early Show and Jane Clayson asked her "How could God let something like this Happen?" (regarding Katrina)

Anne Graham gave an extremely profound and insightful response. She said, "I believe God is deeply saddened by this, just as we are, but for years we've been telling God to get out of our schools, to get out of our government and to get out of our lives.

And being the gentleman He is, I believe He has calmly backed out. How can we expect God to give us His blessing and His protection if we demand He leave us alone?"

In light of recent events...terrorists attack, school shootings, etc. I think it started when Madeleine Murray O'Hare (she was murdered, her body found recently) complained she didn't want prayer in our schools, and we said OK.

Then someone said you better not read the Bible in school. The Bible says thou shalt not kill, thou shalt not steal, and love your neighbor as yourself. And we said OK.

Then Dr. Benjamin Spock said we shouldn't spank our children when they misbehave because their little personalities would be warped and we might damage their self-esteem (Dr. Spock's son committed suicide). We said an expert should know what he's talking about. And we said OK.

Now we're asking ourselves why our children have no conscience, why they don't know right from wrong, and why it doesn't bother them to kill strangers, their classmates, and themselves.

Probably, if we think about it long and hard enough, we can figure it out. I think it has a great deal to do with "WE REAP WHAT WE SOW."

Funny how simple it is for people to trash God and then wonder why the world's going to hell.

Funny how we believe what the newspapers say, but question what the Bible says.

Funny how you can send 'jokes' through e-mail and they spread like wildfire but when you start sending messages regarding the Lord, people think twice about sharing.

Funny how lewd, crude, vulgar and obscene articles pass freely through cyberspace, but public discussion of God is suppressed in the school and workplace.

Are you laughing?

With just a look, they shook...

2006-04-30T23:40:00.000-07:00

Fall 2006: Top 10 Looks That Stole the Season

Lindsay Sammon Fri Mar 24, 5:52 PM ET

Fashion Wire Daily - New York - Much like the calm after the storm, the buzz of the Fall 2006 fashion season has settled and left a string of trends in its wake. From the good (Carolina Herrera's color burst) and the bad (just say "no" to D&G's knit bodysuit), several key trends emerged that have earned their place on the fashion "do" list. Here is a look back at the top ten runway styles that stole the season.

1. Layering
Who says less is more? This season gave us the green light to add vests, scarves, tops upon tops, and virtually anything over a pair of leggings or pants. Layers proved to be one of the more effortless ways to spruce up an outfit, but caveat! This trend can go from stylish to sloppy if done the wrong way. Always the one to hit it right, Marc Jacobs showed dresses over blouses topped with jackets fastened with belts. In Paris, Jean Paul Gaultier used corsets to secure long coats over pants. The layers of the season make way for a little grunge, a little boldness and a lot of options.

2. Volume
The bigger and the bolder, the better. At Richard Chai, models strut the runway in wrap sweaters and coats with oversized necks. Cynthia Rowley experimented with dropped shoulders and the puffball-shaped dress, while the bubble-shaped skirt took to the runway, in various lengths, at DKNY, Chloe, Missoni and Vivienne Westwood.

3. Tousled Temptress
Whether left down and flowing or loosely tied in a bun, disheveled hair brought a polished mess to the forefront of fall beauty, proving that the day-old look has never been hotter. Go ahead, skip a shower or two.

4. Boy Meets Girl
The gender bending that went on for Fall 2006 was among the boldest of trends. Masculine accessories like biker gloves made an appearance at Jose Ramon Reyes and even the glamorous duo at Rodarte strayed from their ultra feminine ways to create pantsuits with muted menswear influences.

5. Glam Rock
Just when you thought you thought your New York Dolls tour t-shirt had met its yard-sale fate, Fall 2006 showed a return to the glam rock roots that fueled fashion in the 1970s. Showy accessories and flamboyant themed-collections, like Jeremy Scott's food-inspired runway show, rocked the runway to the endorsement of many. At Burberry Prorsum, the rebel-chic reigned supreme with tight black looks, and Gucci revisited the glamour of '70s rock and rock with white shimmering suits reminiscent of David Bowie's old digs.

6. Leggings
We say leggings are a do, but be careful when incorporating them into an outfit - there's a science to bringing these back. Whether under a skirt, with or without feet, paired with an oversized sweater, or tucked into boots, leggings returned this season as the must-have functional fashion item (they actually do keep your legs warm). Either solid color leggings, like those at Derek Lam, or printed tights, like the looks at Rachel Comey are fair game for fall.

7. Where For Art Thou, Waistline?
The waist called the shots this season, receiving a lot of attention as designers used it as a focal point for the creation of many of the season's silhouettes. Fendi brought the waistline to new heights, whereas TIBI and Roberto Cavalli used belts to cinch the waist with bow details.

8. A Sci-Fi Style Invasion
Fall 2006 got futuristic on us. ThreeAsFour beautifully captured the science of fashion with huge superhero-like sleeves, trippy prints, and cape-like dresses in bright satin shades, while vivid neon prints, made from old scientific illustrations, took to the runway with Matrix-style capes at Basso and Brooke.

9. Excuse Me, There's Something On Your…
There was an obsession with dressing the face and head this season with various articles, from riding hats at Balenciaga, to eye masks at Comme Des Garcons. The greatest show stopping headpiece award goes to Alexander McQueen for his use of birds nests - complete with a batch of eggs - and even a gauze wrap for the face adorned with deer antlers.

10. Nuts for Navy Is navy the new black?
Donatella Versace experimented with navy throughout the entire collection from double-breasted coatdresses to the color of the model's smoky eye. Alberta Ferretti also focused on navy in her dark and deep color palette for fall, while Chado Ralph Rucci devoted several looks to navy this season as well, showing navy pantsuits spruced up with leather patchwork, dyed to match.

Best thing you never had... right you sell out

2006-04-29T13:46:00.000-07:00

Its long, but good. Written by David Eggers:

You actually asked me the question: "Are you taking any steps to keep shit real?" I want you always to look back on this time as being a time when those words came out of your mouth.

Now, there was a time when such a question - albeit probably without the colloquial spin - would have originated from my own brain. Since I was thirteen, sitting in my orange-carpeted bedroom in ostensibly cutting-edge Lake Forest, Illinois, subscribing to the Village Voice and reading the earliest issues of Spin, I thought I had my ear to the railroad tracks of avant garde America. (Laurie Anderson, for example, had grown up only miles away!) I was always monitoring, with the most sensitive and well-calibrated apparatus, the degree of selloutitude exemplified by any given artist - musical, visual, theatrical, whatever. I was vigilant and merciless and knew it was my job to be so.

I bought R.E.M.'s first EP, Chronic Town, when it came out and thought I had found God. I loved Murmur, Reckoning, but then watched, with greater and greater dismay, as this obscure little band's audience grew, grew beyond obsessed people like myself, grew to encompass casual fans, people who had heard a song on the radio and picked up Green and listened for the hits. Old people liked them, and stupid people, and my moron neighbor who had sex with truck drivers. I wanted these phony R.E.M.-lovers dead.

But it was the band's fault, too. They played on Letterman. They switched record labels. Even their album covers seemed progressively more commercial. And when everyone I knew began liking them, I stopped. Had they changed, had their commitment to making art with integrity changed? I didn't care, because for me, any sort of popularity had an inverse relationship with what you term the keeping 'real' of 'shit.' When the Smiths became slightly popular they were sellouts. Bob Dylan appeared on MTV and of course was a sellout. Recently, just at dinner tonight, after a huge, sold-out reading by David Sedaris and Sarah Vowell (both sellouts), I was sitting next to an acquaintance, a very smart acquaintance married to the singer-songwriter of a very well-known band. I mentioned that I had seen the Flaming Lips the night before. She rolled her eyes. "Oh I really liked them on 90210," she sneered, assuming that this would put me and the band in our respective places.

However.

Was she aware that The Flaming Lips had composed an album requiring the simultaneous playing of four separate discs, on four separate CD players? Was she aware that the band had once, for a show at Lincoln Center, handed out to audience members something like 100 portable tape players, with 100 different tapes, and had them all played at the same time, creating a symphonic sort of effect, one which completely devastated everyone in attendance? I went on and on to her about the band's accomplishments, their experiments. Was she convinced that they were more than their one appearance with Jason Priestly? She was.

Now, at that concert the night before, Wayne Coyne, the lead singer, had himself addressed this issue, and to great effect. After playing much of their new album, the band paused and he spoke to the audience. I will paraphrase what he said:

"Hi. Well, some people get all bitter when some song of theirs gets popular, and they refuse to play it. But we're not like that. We're happy that people like this song. So here it goes."

Then they played the song. (You know the song.) "She Don't Use Jelly" is the song, and it is a silly song, and it was their most popular song. But to highlight their enthusiasm for playing the song, the band released, from the stage and from the balconies, about 200 balloons. (Some of the balloons, it should be noted, were released by two grown men in bunny suits.) Then while playing the song, Wayne sang with a puppet on his hand, who also sang into the microphone. It was fun. It was good.

But was it a sellout? Probably. By some standards, yes. Can a good band play their hit song? Should we hate them for this? Probably, probably. First 90210, now they go playing the song every stupid night. Everyone knows that 90210 is not cutting edge, and that a cutting edge alternarock band should not appear on such a show. That rule is clearly stated in the obligatory engrained computer-chip sellout manual that we were all given when we hit adolescence.
But this sellout manual serves only the lazy and small. Those who bestow sellouthood upon their former heroes are driven to do so by, first and foremost, the unshakable need to reduce. The average one of us - a taker-in of various and constant media, is absolutely overwhelmed - as he or she should be - with the sheer volume of artistic output in every conceivable medium given to the world every day - it is simply too much to begin to process or comprehend - and so we are forced to try to sort, to reduce. We designate, we label, we diminish, we create hierarchies and categories.

Through largely received wisdom, we rule out Tom Waits's new album because it's the same old same old, and we save $15. U2 has lost it, Radiohead is too popular. Country music is bad, Puff Daddy is bad, the last Wallace book was bad because that one reviewer said so. We decide that TV is bad unless it's the Sopranos. We liked Rick Moody and Jonathan Lethem and Jeffrey Eugenides until they allowed their books to become movies. And on and on. The point is that we do this and to a certain extent we must do this. We must create categories, and to an extent, hierarchies.

But you know what is easiest of all? When we dismiss.

Oh how gloriously comforting, to be able to write someone off. Thus, in the overcrowded pantheon of alternarock bands, at a certain juncture, it became necessary for a certain brand of person to write off The Flaming Lips, despite the fact that everyone knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that their music was superb and groundbreaking and real. We could write them off because they shared a few minutes with Jason Priestley and that terrifying Tori Spelling person. Or we could write them off because too many magazines have talked about them. Or because it looked like the bassist was wearing too much gel in his hair.
One less thing to think about. Now, how to kill off the rest of our heroes, to better make room for new ones?

We liked Guided by Voices until they let Ric Ocasek produce their latest album, and everyone knows Ocasek is a sellout, having written those mushy Cars songs in the late 80s, and then - gasp! - produced Weezer's album, and of course Weezer's no good, because that Sweater song was on the radio, right, and dorky teenage girls were singing it and we cannot have that and so Weezer is bad and Ocasek is bad and Guided by Voices are bad, even if Spike Jonze did direct that one Weezer video, and we like Spike Jonze, don't we?
Oh. No. We don't. We don't like him anymore because he's married to Sofia Coppola, and she is not cool. Not cool. So bad in Godfather 3, such nepotism. So let's check off Spike Jonze - leaving room in our brains for who??
It's exhausting.

The only thing worse than this sort of activity is when people, students and teachers alike, run around college campuses calling each other racists and anti-Semites. It's born of boredom, lassitude. Too cowardly to address problems of substance where such problems actually are, we claw at those close to us. We point to our neighbor, in the khakis and sweater, and cry foul. It's ridiculous. We find enemies among our peers because we know them better, and their proximity and familiarity means we don't have to get off the couch to dismantle them.

And now, I am also a sellout. Here are my sins, many of which you may know about already:
First, I was a sellout because Might magazine took ads.Then I was a sellout because our pages were color, and not stapled together at the Kinko's.Then I was a sellout because I went to work for Esquire.Now I'm a sellout because my book has sold many copies.And because I have done many interviews.And because I have let people take my picture.And because my goddamn picture has been in just about every fucking magazine and newspaper printed in America.

And now, as far as McSweeney's is concerned, The Advocate interviewer wants to know if we're losing also our edge, if the magazine is selling out, hitting the mainstream, if we're still committed to publishing unknowns, and pieces killed by other magazines.

And the fact is, I don't give a fuck. When we did the last issue, this was my thought process: I saw a box. So I decided we'd do a box. We were given stories by some of our favorite writers - George Saunders, Rick Moody (who is uncool, uncool!), Haruki Murakami, Lydia Davis, others - and so we published them. Did I wonder if people would think we were selling out, that we were not fulfilling the mission they had assumed we had committed ourselves to?
No. I did not. Nor will I ever. We just don't care. We care about doing what we want to do creatively. We want to be interested in it. We want it to challenge us. We want it to be difficult. We want to reinvent the stupid thing every time. Would I ever think, before I did something, of how those with sellout monitors would respond to this or that move? I would not. The second I sense a thought like that trickling into my brain, I will put my head under the tires of a bus.

You want to know how big a sellout I am?

A few months ago I wrote an article for Time magazine and was paid $12,000 for it I am about to write something, 1,000 words, 3 pages or so, for something called Forbes ASAP, and for that I will be paid $6,000 For two years, until five months ago, I was on the payroll of ESPN magazine, as a consultant and sometime contributor. I was paid handsomely for doing very little. Same with my stint at Esquire. One year I spent there, with little to no duties. I wore khakis every day. Another Might editor and I, for almost a year, contributed to Details magazine, under pseudonyms, and were paid $2000 each for what never amounted to more than 10 minutes work - honestly never more than that. People from Hollywood want to make my book into a movie, and I am probably going to let them do so, and they will likely pay me a great deal of money for the privilege.

Do I care about this money? I do. Will I keep this money? Very little of it. Within the year I will have given away almost a million dollars to about 100 charities and individuals, benefiting everything from hospice care to an artist who makes sculptures from Burger King bags. And the rest will be going into publishing books through McSweeney's. Would I have been able to publish McSweeney's if I had not worked at Esquire? Probably not. Where is the $6000 from Forbes going? To a guy named Joe Polevy, who wants to write a book about the effects of radiator noise on children in New England.

Now, what if I were keeping all the money? What if I were buying property in St. Kitt's or blew it all on live-in prostitutes? What if, for example, I was, a few nights ago, sitting at a table in SoHo with a bunch of Hollywood slash celebrity acquaintances, one of whom I went to high school with, and one of whom was Puff Daddy? Would that make me a sellout? Would that mean I was a force of evil?

What if a few nights before that I was at the home of Julian Schnabel, at a party featuring Al Pacino and Robert DeNiro, and at which Schnabel said we should get together to talk about him possibly directing my movie? And what if I said sure, let's?

Would all that make me a sellout? Would I be uncool? Would it have been more cool to not go to this party, or to not have written that book, or done that interview, or to have refused millions from Hollywood?

The thing is, I really like saying yes. I like new things, projects, plans, getting people together and doing something, trying something, even when it's corny or stupid. I am not good at saying no. And I do not get along with people who say no. When you die, and it really could be this afternoon, under the same bus wheels I'll stick my head if need be, you will not be happy about having said no. You will be kicking your ass about all the no's you've said. No to that opportunity, or no to that trip to Nova Scotia or no to that night out, or no to that project or no to that person who wants to be naked with you but you worry about what your friends will say.

No is for wimps. No is for pussies. No is to live small and embittered, cherishing the opportunities you missed because they might have sent the wrong message.

There is a point in one's life when one cares about selling out and not selling out. One worries whether or not wearing a certain shirt means that they are behind the curve or ahead of it, or that having certain music in one's collection means that they are impressive, or unimpressive.
Thankfully, for some, this all passes. I am here to tell you that I have, a few years ago, found my way out of that thicket of comparison and relentless suspicion and judgment. And it is a nice feeling. Because, in the end, no one will ever give a shit who has kept shit 'real' except the two or three people, sitting in their apartments, bitter and self-devouring, who take it upon themselves to wonder about such things. The keeping real of shit matters to some people, but it does not matter to me. It's fashion, and I don't like fashion, because fashion does not matter.

What matters is that you do good work. What matters is that you produce things that are true and will stand. What matters is that the Flaming Lips's new album is ravishing and I've listened to it a thousand times already, sometimes for days on end, and it enriches me and makes me want to save people. What matters is that it will stand forever, long after any narrow-hearted curmudgeons have forgotten their appearance on goddamn 90210. What matters is not the perception, nor the fashion, not who's up and who's down, but what someone has done and if they meant it. What matters is that you want to see and make and do, on as grand a scale as you want, regardless of what the tiny voices of tiny people say. Do not be critics, you people, I beg you. I was a critic and I wish I could take it all back because it came from a smelly and ignorant place in me, and spoke with a voice that was all rage and envy. Do not dismiss a book until you have written one, and do not dismiss a movie until you have made one, and do not dismiss a person until you have met them. It is a fuckload of work to be open-minded and generous and understanding and forgiving and accepting, but Christ, that is what matters. What matters is saying yes.
I say yes, and Wayne Coyne says yes, and if that makes us the enemy, then good, good, good. We are evil people because we want to live and do things. We are on the wrong side because we should be home, calculating which move would be the least damaging to our downtown reputations. But I say yes because I am curious. I want to see things. I say yes when my high school friend tells me to come out because he's hanging with Puffy. A real story, that. I say yes when Hollywood says they'll give me enough money to publish a hundred different books, or send twenty kids through college. Saying no is so fucking boring.

And if anyone wants to hurt me for that, or dismiss me for that, for saying yes, I say Oh do it, do it you motherfuckers, finally, finally, finally.

I dont wanna be a "Stupid Girl"

2006-04-05T11:19:00.000-07:00

Well, this journal has officially become a place where I place articles I think are interesting. The following is by J.K. Rowling:

"So the issue of size and women was (ha, ha) weighing on my mind as I flew home to Edinburgh the next day. Once up in the air, I opened a newspaper and my eyes fell, immediately, on an article about the pop star Pink."

"Being thin. Probably not a subject that you ever expected to read about on this website, but my recent trip to London got me thinking...

It started in the car on the way to Leavesden film studios. I whiled away part of the journey reading a magazine that featured several glossy photographs of a very young woman who is either seriously ill or suffering from an eating disorder (which is, of course, the same thing); anyway, there is no other explanation for the shape of her body. She can talk about eating absolutely loads, being terribly busy and having the world's fastest metabolism until her tongue drops off (hooray! Another couple of ounces gone!), but her concave stomach, protruding ribs and stick-like arms tell a different story. This girl needs help, but, the world being what it is, they're sticking her on magazine covers instead. All this passed through my mind as I read the interview, then I threw the horrible thing aside.

But blow me down if the subject of girls and thinness didn't crop up shortly after I got out of the car. I was talking to one of the actors and, somehow or other, we got onto the subject of a girl he knows (not any of the Potter actresses – somebody from his life beyond the films) who had been dubbed 'fat' by certain charming classmates. (Could they possibly be jealous that she knows the boy in question? Surely not!)

'But,' said the actor, in honest perplexity, 'she is really not fat.'

'"Fat" is usually the first insult a girl throws at another girl when she wants to hurt her,' I said; I could remember it happening when I was at school, and witnessing it among the teenagers I used to teach. Nevertheless, I could see that to him, a well-adjusted male, it was utterly bizarre behaviour, like yelling 'thicko!' at Stephen Hawking.

His bemusement at this everyday feature of female existence reminded me how strange and sick the 'fat' insult is. I mean, is 'fat' really the worst thing a human being can be? Is 'fat' worse than 'vindictive', 'jealous', 'shallow', 'vain', 'boring' or 'cruel'? Not to me; but then, you might retort, what do I know about the pressure to be skinny? I'm not in the business of being judged on my looks, what with being a writer and earning my living by using my brain...

I went to the British Book Awards that evening. After the award ceremony I bumped into a woman I hadn't seen for nearly three years. The first thing she said to me? 'You've lost a lot of weight since the last time I saw you!'

'Well,' I said, slightly nonplussed, 'the last time you saw me I'd just had a baby.'

What I felt like saying was, 'I've produced my third child and my sixth novel since I last saw you. Aren't either of those things more important, more interesting, than my size?' But no – my waist looked smaller! Forget the kid and the book: finally, something to celebrate!

So the issue of size and women was (ha, ha) weighing on my mind as I flew home to Edinburgh the next day. Once up in the air, I opened a newspaper and my eyes fell, immediately, on an article about the pop star Pink.

Her latest single, 'Stupid Girls', is the antidote-anthem for everything I had been thinking about women and thinness. 'Stupid Girls' satirises the talking toothpicks held up to girls as role models: those celebrities whose greatest achievement is un-chipped nail polish, whose only aspiration seems to be getting photographed in a different outfit nine times a day, whose only function in the world appears to be supporting the trade in overpriced handbags and rat-sized dogs.

Maybe all this seems funny, or trivial, but it's really not. It's about what girls want to be, what they're told they should be, and how they feel about who they are. I've got two daughters who will have to make their way in this skinny-obsessed world, and it worries me, because I don't want them to be empty-headed, self-obsessed, emaciated clones; I'd rather they were independent, interesting, idealistic, kind, opinionated, original, funny – a thousand things, before 'thin'. And frankly, I'd rather they didn't give a gust of stinking chihuahua flatulence whether the woman standing next to them has fleshier knees than they do. Let my girls be Hermiones, rather than Pansy Parkinsons. Let them never be Stupid Girls. Rant over."

source: JKRowling.com

Things that make you go hmmmm...

2006-03-28T11:27:00.000-08:00

Survey: U.S. trust lowest for atheists
By Jeannine Aquino

Atheists are America’s least trusted group, according to a national survey conducted by University sociology researchers.
Based on a telephone survey of more than 2,000 households and in-depth interviews with more than 140 people, researchers found that Americans rate atheists below Muslims, recent immigrants, homosexuals and other groups as “sharing their vision of American society.” Americans are also least willing to let their children marry atheists.

“It tells us about how Americans view religion,” said Penny Edgell, an associate sociology professor and the study’s lead researcher. “Many Americans seem to believe some kind of religious faith is central to being a good American and a good person.”

The study will appear in the April issue of the “American Sociological Review.” Professor Joseph Gerteis and associate professor Douglas Hartmann are study co-authors. It is the first in a series of national studies conducted by the American Mosaic Project, a three-year project that looks at race, religion and cultural diversity in the United States.

Edgell said Americans traditionally have been a religious people and associate faith with being a good citizen. The survey results indicate that this belief hasn’t changed, Edgell said.

Those surveyed tended to view people who don’t believe in a god as the “ultimate self-interested actor who doesn’t care about anyone but themselves,” Edgell said.

Cole Ries, the president of the Maranatha Christian Fellowship said he does not agree with that perception.

“Atheists seem to be concerned with the human good,” he said. “Where I differ as a Christian is that I’m more concerned with God’s will than man’s will.”

Still, Ries said, “I don’t believe that anybody is really an atheist. I believe that deep down everyone knows there is a god.”

Robert O’Connor, a sophomore and member of Campus Atheists and Secular Humanists, said he was not surprised by the survey results.

Americans generally are very religious, O’Connor said, and people usually are suspicious about those who do not share the same beliefs.

“People really strongly believe that religion and good morals are one and the same,” O’Connor said. “Increasing problems of society — for example, juvenile delinquency — are being blamed on lack of religious value.”

Joe Foley, co-chairman for Campus Atheists and Secular Humanists, was not surprised by the results, either.

“I know atheists aren’t studied that much as a sociological group, but I guess atheists are one of the last groups remaining that it’s still socially acceptable to hate,” Foley said.

First-year pharmacy student Amanda Wawrzynia, however, found the study reasonable.

She said she would have ranked atheists at the bottom of the list of those sharing the same vision of American society.

“I would rather have my kids marry someone of a different religion than someone who has none,” she said.

Yet Benjamin Abrams, a member of the Jewish student center Hillel, said he was surprised people would have reservations about their children marrying atheists.

“I understand if people want to marry someone of a similar faith, but I don’t understand why it would be any different from marrying a Muslim, a Jew or a Christian,” Abrams said. “It’s another religious belief. I don’t understand why atheism would have negative connotations.”

Abrams said Judaism teaches that people’s actions, not one’s beliefs, are what matter most.

“(Atheists) should have the same rights to not believe as someone would have the right to believe,” he said.

First-year biology student Joe Reutiman calls the results a “sad state of affairs.”

“(Atheists) have the right to believe whatever they want, even if that belief is nothing,” Reutiman said. “They shouldn’t have to fit in with the clean-cut American life like a Norman Rockwell painting.”

I say if you wanna be an Atheist, then people should respect that. And I don't think it makes them untrustworthy.

We're still young

2006-03-13T02:07:00.000-08:00

Come on, take a step towards me so you can figure me out. I've been hoping and praying for a single way to show you what I'm all about. And I know, and I know this is the only way of pleasing the crowds. But when this is over and done with and we walk away, there should be no doubts.

So let's get a little closer now, let's get a little closer now...

You say, you say that we're all tied up and wrapped around in useless, useless states of mind. But at the same time we're still young. We have the time to realize that we were wrong.

Come on, love, run with me, get the hell out of this town so we can get a better feel for each other. I'll take you back to when you remembered how you used to be. Just live your life a little for me. Take the time to let it go, step away and watch me grow.

So let's get a little closer now, let's get a little closer now...

You say, you say that we're all tied up and wrapped around in useless, useless states of mind. But at the same time we're still young. We have the time to realize that we were wrong.

You can stay if you want to and I write to you and tell you how you've always been so special to me. You can stay if you want to, and I'll try. You can stay if you want to and I write to you and tell you how you've always been so special to me. You can stay if you want to, and I'll try... To keep you close to me. To keep you close to me. To keep you close to me...

You say, you say that we're all tied up and wrapped around in useless, useless states of mind. But at the same time we're still young. We have the time to realize that we were wrong...

City of Evil

2006-02-28T16:55:00.000-08:00

I had to stick this somewhere due to myspace blog editing....:

blah blah blah... Avenged Sevenfold, or as aforementioned generous person likes to refer to them- Avenged Sevenfucks. Haha. And the obsession is in part to do to Syn, pics posted a few posts below.

So you guys don't think that I'm just this crazy girl obsessed with boys in bands, I have to tell you that he is the most amazing lead guitarist... that I just happen to find attractive also. His solos, on cd, are enough to make me cry, but actually seeing his fingers FLY across those strings in their live vids make me insane. Apparently he was a jazz student and he says, "I love jazz from a metal standpoint" Ummm, ok. But just wait b/c in regards to his style, he goes on to say he likes, "Crazy arpeggios with tons of altered notes, but equally palatable as the straight-ahead stuff. Anything to make it heavier, goofier, funnier. I'm a big climax guy. I want every song to be a rollercoaster ride, but to never forget about structure and melody. And I'm a guitar geek, so its always technical." Yeah... I think you know where I'm going with this. He basically turns me into a puddle of goo. *sigh* I love crushes. For your viewing and listening pleasure, here's a vid of him playing a solo... not his best regarding both speed and melody (my opinion at least, I think his best is his solo in "Beast and the Harlot" which can be found on MTV overdrive... or downloaded below), but just him going crazy on his guitar none the less:

Syn's Solo (upload expires)

Beast and the Harlot (upload expired)(if you don't wanna watch the whole thing, which I think you should, except for the fact that his backup singing sucks towards the end, his first solo starts about 1:58... and the mtv one is alot easier to watch, this cam jumps around too much... and upon watching again, i think he plays the end a key higher, so yeah, go watch the mtv one too)

And if you bother to download and watch those, you will understand, or maybe if you go watch the live Beast and the Harlot vid mentioned previously. If not, and you still think I'm just a stupid fan girl, then please shut the fuck up and don't bother ever bringing it up to me. :o)

Hey Chris, you were our only friend.

2006-02-28T16:44:00.000-08:00

Well, this is interesting. A post from Chris of "Hey Chris":

an open letter to pete wentz. [Feb. 28th, 2006|03:50 pm]

it takes a lot to make me mad.
it takes even more to infuriate me.

so, after all this time i finally learned the truth. that it was you telling my ex girlfriend lies and secrets. despite even giving you the pass card after i caught you trying to talk dirty to her online, this is how you repay me? no wonder why you couldnt look me in the eye on the bus last summer and no wonder why you avoided me every chance you got.
you hug me and tell me you love me then you tell lies to my girlfriend behind my back to lure her away from me? you tell her i cheat on her and then you tell me to come stay on the bus?
you are a spineless fucking sham.

i regret every second i spent defending you and your selfish ways.
dont forget, i know you. not that shitty glammed up poser image you present to the masses to consume. the dude i knew never would have worn a fucking dinosaur shirt or sold out one of his friends. the dude i knew had heart and fucking loyalty. well lil buddy, you are fucking done.

you want to sell me out to the most important person in my life and then have the audacity to make ME think I did something wrong to not deserve your friendship? you fucking arrogant bastard.
since we're discussing sellouts lets discuss how when kids give you presents you laugh at them and throw it straight in the trash. oh yeah, ive seen it many times. lets talk about how you talk shit about the fat girls that are your fans and mock their letters. you are fucking undeserving of every ounce of attention you've ever gotten. from every one of your calculated business moves to your "spontaneous" jumps in the crowd parts to your well rehearsed cliche lines you've been spouting for 400 shows in a row. you're boring, contrived and old. "oooh, no one loves me, its sooo hard being on magazine covers and tv shows. someone save me from me." what are you, fucking 12? go light your little candles ask yourself why no one will ever truly love you. its amazing no one has caught on to your little fucking show. you're nothing more than a shitty opportunist business man with even shittier fashion sense.

so pack up and move to whatever million dollar house you've picked out in california paid for by your lies and hypocrisy and deceit and selfishness and over medicate yourself like youve been doing for years...because guess what? no one wants you here anymore. you are not welcome.

oh yeah, hows that straight edge tattoo doing? as well as the tattoo for your "crew" who now refer to you as a fraud and a con? stay gold dude, stay gold.

remember this each night of the tour when you play the lie, "hey chris, you were our only friend."
downplay it all you want by saying the song is about "friends", but guess whos fucking name you're saying each and every night? mine. thats right. what a bunch of fucking phonies. sing the songs you dont even believe in anymore. fucking liar.

you know the friends i have and you know how we feel about loyalty.
you know who im talking about and you know they're not happy either.
so dont get caught slipping and you better make damn sure you watch whos on your guest list because a plus one might come backstage to punch your fucking teeth out and tear the windpipe from your throat.

you fucking sell out.

oh, and next time you decide to write another song about me, do it right you fucking coward.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Well then... carry on.

I don't believe in Fairytales and no one wants to go to hell.

2006-02-05T13:10:00.000-08:00

Remember:

"A good friend will come bail you out of a tight spot...

But a true friend will be sitting next to you saying ... "WE screwed up, but we had fun!!!!!!" (I dont know if I necessarily believe that one.)

What I've learned...

I've learned...that life is like a roll of toilet paper: the closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I've learned...that we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we ask for.

I've learned...that money doesn't buy class.

I've learned...that it's those small daily happenings that make life so spectacular.

I've learned...that under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to be appreciated and loved.

I've learned...that the Lord didn't do it all in one day, What makes me think I can?

I've learned...that to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

I've learned...that the less time I have to work, the more things I get done.

I've learned.

After that FLUFF, here's some CHEESE:

A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty?
He said...no.

She asked him if he would want to be with her forever?
And again, he said no.

She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry?
And once again he replied with a no.

She had heard enough.

As she walked away, tears streaming down her face, the boy grabbed her arm and said...

You're not pretty you're beautiful!

I don't want to be with you forever, I NEED to be with you forever!

And I wouldn't cry if you walked away...I'd die!

Obviously no guy would ever say that, but I've read it before and its cute and Valentine's day is coming up... so there, deal with that... and then go throw up if you have to, it kinda made me want to.

Moving on... I went to Social D this week, can't remember if I wrote about that. They were good, it was suprisingly the first time I saw em. Due to an awesome friend, we had vip seats up in the balcony of the HOB. Good view.

I decided that I NEED to see A7X when they play here in two weeks, but I finally went to buy my ticket and they are sold out. I wanna cry. Especially b/c I've obtained some live vids and Syn is so fucking amazing it makes me... well, wanna cry, but I just said that, so, it makes me wanna do something else like cry. His solos are so unbelievable, the boy is talented beyond belief. Apparently he was trained in jazz, but even though he plays metal now, he still incorporates all these crazy arpeggios and the rythm and notes he plays just leave me speechless. I won't even go into his speed b/c I'll explode. So needless to say, he's a guitar god. Doesn't hurt that he's incredibly hot. I want him to have my babies haha

What else... oh, I have an interview on Monday. Its with a music management firm and if I get the position, I'm gonna be ecstatic! I think thats what I wanna do with my life. I don't like entertainment law b/c I'm not close enough to the music and artists. I want to be more personally involved outside of contracts. It sounds like the company really wants me, so I have to go sit my ass at barnes and noble later and finish reading this management book. I think management is kinda self-explanatory and that you rely on instict a lot, but a book can't hurt.

I hit a new weight low two days ago, and then gained a couple lbs back. I hate my body. Hate it, hate it, hate it!! I decided that maybe I needed to cut back my food intake more, but instead my metabolism slowed to match it. Yup, hate you body!! So, this week I think I'm finally gonna pick a gym to join. I really liked crunch, but I have a feeling they will be too expensive, so I will probably end up at 24 hr fitness. Which may be better b/c there's no parking time restrictions, so I can get in a full workout, treadmill, abs, weights and all. Whereas at crunch, I felt like I was always running out of there to make it in under 2 hours. Its all gonna depend on price since I'm a brokeass!!

Ok, happy super bowl sunday, I'm not watching it, but go pitt. Peace out.

Seize The Day

2006-01-31T00:02:00.000-08:00

One of my New Year's resolutions was to update my blog more. Well, thats not going as well as I liked. I'm one month in and this is my first post. What have I accomplished? Well, I quit my job and lost a little more weight. So overall, not going too horribly. I have an interview next week with a management company in the music part. Im mucho excited. Its kind of a funny story, here it is:

So as I was leaving my job, on my last day, an hour later than I usually leave, I'm waiting by the elevator when some other lady waiting says that she's been waiting there for awhile (we're on the top floor of the building). I reply, "great, that means its gonna take forever to get down, like usualy though." And she asks if I work on the floor, to which I laugh and mention its my last day. She asks who I worked for and I tell her two of the entertainment attorneys, and how I'm leaving b/c I don't really like sitting at a desk all day and I wanna go temp for awhile at labels b/c I feel the need to be "closer to the music." She then starts getting excited and asks if I have a financial background. I think thats a really random question, but I answer honestly that I do. And she tells me that she works with the management company on the other side of the floor, in the music division and how they are looking for someone, so will I please send them my info. I tell her that I've thought about getting into managing, so I will surely send it over. I proceed to do nothing over the next two days. Then I have a temp job for a day at a talent agency. I hated it. I hate the movie/tv business and I want absolutely nothing to do with it. But, I need to make money, so whatever jobs the temp place calls with, I kinda have to take. So then I decide that I really should send her my info. I pick up one of my roomates books to flip through, something about a guide to managing your band. And I loved it. Obviously I've read many books on the music business and know how it works, so nothing came as a big surprise, but it really made me feel that perhaps management would be the best fit for me. So, I send over my resume, and she calls me the next morning to schedule an interview for asap next week when her partner gets back into town. So, I have an interview on Monday for a music management postition and I'm ecstatic!!! Send me good thoughts and all that stuff!

Moving on... what else has happened this month... well, a lot, a real lot. Tater was here for a couple weeks visiting. We managed to get to Metal Skool not once but twice whereupon I fell in love with the lead singer. He has long hair, but his smile is so amazing that I can look past that fact. Anyone who lives in LA and hasn't been to metal skool is an absolute idiot. Even Joe Simpson was there! haha
You can read more about this in my myspace blog.

Tomorrow night we're going to Social D in Anaheim and I couldn't be more excited. Not only do I get to see Social D play, but I finally get to see some hottie rock boys!! I can't seem to find where they hang out in LA. That makes me sad. Speaking of hottie rock boys, I have a massive new crush. He's soooo yummy, and I wanna do... ummmmm... yeah. I think my little cousins might read my blog, can't remember. Anyway, here he is:

His "name" is "Syn", well "Synyster Gates" and I think thats pretty appropriate b/c I wanna commit a lot of sins with him. Yes, I know that sounds corny/cheesy/cliche.... but oh man is it true too. "The Rev" isn't bad either, but he's a bit thin for my tastes, so I'll leave him for Terri. I've banned myself from watching their vids for the rest of the day b/c watching his fingers fly across the strings... what is it that is so hot about guys' hands! Major turn on when guys have good hands. In the spirit of staring at this boy all day, allysa and I made a little trip to Babeland. I bought a new vi****or. Hehe.

I had more to talk about, but I can't remember anything now after all that last stuff. I think I need to get to bed. Night! :)

Social D tomorrow, yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy. Its like Christmas Eve, the sooner I get to bed, the sooner Socail D will be here! I'm such a geek, I'm aware, you don't have to tell me.

Ain't it funny

2005-12-18T22:16:00.000-08:00

Aint it funny how a particular song, lyric, chord or opening few notes of a song can immediately transport you back to a particular place and time. And all the sudden you are in the past and can remember the exact way you felt at that time, maybe what you were wearing, the smells, the sights, the tastes. This has happened to me twice in the past 24 hours.

Last night when Unwritten Law played Cailin, I was transported back to a hot night in August 2000. I know what was going on and how I felt, but I'd like to keep that all to myself if you don't mind. Some things need to remain precious, sweet and secret.

The second time this happened was tonight when Steph and I finished our bottle of wine and she was telling me all the cd's she bought for family members for Christmas. One was Mark Knophler (sp?) from Dire Straight and I brought up how she once told me she didn't know the song "Romeo and Juliet", so I decided to go on a quest for it, b/c I believe that everyone should know that song. It's so beautiful. Well, I found it. I knew exactly what I was looking for. In my mass pile of cd's, it would be a hot pink cd with blue marker writing on it. I made it in 1998. I put it on and was transported back to dorm rooms, smokey cars, and cruising to Perkins with Katie and Keri.
To give you just a little taste of a typical ride with us at this time, the tracklisting on this cd:
1. Independent Love Song
2. BNL- One Week
3. Closer to Fine
4. Leaving on Jet Plane
5. Prince- Kiss
6. Indigo Girls- Gallileo
7. Indigo Girls- Romeo and Juliet
8. Prince- Seven
9. "If I could hold you tonight..."
10. Don McLean- American Pie
11. Phish- Bouncin' 'Round the room
12. More Indigo Girls
13. Ani Difranco- Untouchable Face

Wow, those songs bring back a hella lot of memories. Especially Untouchable Face which was blasted and sang loudly whenever a friend had a problem with a stupid boy. And Romeo and Juliet, usually the Dire Straight version, which was always on the Juke Box at Angelo's to which we'd sing and twirl around. And considering this was usually around 2am, when we'd been drinking since 9pm, it was always a great, drunken time. And oh man, Piano Man! This was always sung and swayed to with whoever was left in Angelo's at closing time. Usually there was still many of us there. Good times. These songs bring back so much nostalgia, I miss and long for those moments again sometimes. If I close my eyes and get lost in the songs, I once again feel like I am back in those times, being a teenager, without a care in the world, surrounded by my friends... twirling and singing...

December is for cynics, December is for critics.

2005-12-11T11:37:00.000-08:00

I went and saw Brokeback Mountain at The Grove yesterday with Lizzy and Jill. I guess thats one of the benefits to living in LA since the movie was only released in a total of 5 theaters nationwide yesterday. I don't think I had been that excited to see a movie in a very long time. It was the only movie that was sold out for all times, all weekend. Some box office mumbo-jumbo for ya:

""Brokeback Mountain" came in at No. 16, with a total gross of $545,000. It had a limited release, opening Friday, December 9th and playing in only 5 theaters (three in New York City, one in Los Angeles and one in San Fransisco). This means it made an estimated $109,000 per theater, making it officially the highest per theater average for a live-action film on an opening weekend."

It might be weird, but this kinda gives me hope that America is breaking down its gay-hate barriers. I really enjoyed the movie and will definately be seeing it again. I have so many friends that still want to see it, I will just have to be a good friend and join them :)

I went to a couple of holiday parties last night, only made it to 2 out of 3, but I still think thats good, 3 would have been stretching the night too thin. First one was a sweater party! If you don't know what that is, its where you are supposed to wear cheesy Christmas sweaters with like reindeer and shit on em. The best were the white turtlenecks with the holiday print... oh lord, my mother still wears those! But Steph and I didn't dress to theme b/c we are too cool for that obviously. J/k, it was b/c we didn't want to go to party #2 looking ridiculous. Although it would have been quite a conversation starter. Or not, I don't think I'd be suprised to see anything in LA ;)

Back to party #1 for a min, there were 5 boys that lived in that house, and they decorated the shit out of their living room, I mean they wallpapered the entire room in christmas wrapping paper! It was hysterical. They had also taken a house picture in their sweaters which was cute. They covered the garage roof in an insane amount of christmas lights, tinseled all the trees in the front yard, lined the front walk in those oversized candy canes.... I love boys that go all out, makes it that much more fun. People watching to see what everyone was wearing was pretty fun too. There was a girl wrapped in lights, but couldn't go too far from an outlet haha, she should have gotten battery operated lights!
Another great thing about last night, I spent $0!!! YAY!

Other random shit- I think I want to go to Metal Skool tomorrow night. I haven't been there in so long! Maybe El Compadre and then Metal Skool, ooh, that'd be the most perfect night!
I'm gonna head to So Good Jewelery today to do some Xmas shopping for my cousins.
The only person I've bought something for is older bro. I'm assuming I will do most of my shopping when I get back to Chicago in a week b/c I really don't see the sense in hauling presents with me on the plane. I ordered bro's gift online and had it shipped straight home b/c I'm smart like that. Speaking of home, they got a shit load of snow the other day and a plane slid off the runway at Midway. Sad shit. I'm hoping there is no snow in sight the day I fly b/c I don't want to live in Vegas's airport for a day or longer. Even though it would be nice if they set me up at a hotel on the strip, but I don't see that happening.

Other randomness- Noel Gallagher: "JACK White [of the White Stripes] has just written a song for Coca-Cola. End of. He ceases to be in the club. And he looks like Zorro on doughnuts"
That is just the funniest shit I've heard in awhile! We decided life is a lot more fun when you go thru it drunk. And I think Noel and Liam could definately be the poster boys for that notion! A friend suggested that if we go thru life drunk, cars should be made out of nurf material. That's a great idea even without the drunkness! Then again, his sweater mooed, so I ofcourse expected great things from him.

I may also go browse Ameoba today, although its probably a zoo. I need some new tunage. I was pretty disappointed in my last purchase from Ameoba (aka MECCA!)- Panic! At the Disco. It's ok, but definatley not worth any form of my currency. Speaking of music, I might be going to The Beat's holiday concert on Wednesday night. This might be terrible of me, but I see it going the way of Rock the Mic a few summers ago, basically me being stared at for being whitie.

For those who are my my space friend, I will be adding pics from last night soon :)
Oh, and also pics of our fabulous Christmas tree! I don't know if I've written about this, but we got a 6 ft fresh tree, which I got all by myself and just tossed into the backseat of my car b/c I'm cool like that! We put a crazy amount of tinsel on it, its gaudy and tacky and I adore it! We might throw a party on Thursday night so everyone can come over and see our tree. Haha, we are so fabulous. Is it rude to throw a BYOB party? Probably, dammit!

I need a haircut so bad :( Maybe I'll ask for it for Christmas! I have no idea what to ask for b/c I pretty much have everything I need and my mom just took me shopping when I was home for Thanksgiving. So, I really don't need anything at all.

I need to do laundry so bad, so I better get a move on... take care all!

Take my hand, take my life.

2005-12-01T19:16:00.000-08:00

Grrr, I don't update enough. Not that I have anything important to say in this post...

Lets see... I went home for Thanksgiving break, I felt like I was in the twlight zone! I'd been gone for 6 months, but absolutely nothing changed. I guess its the same as going away to college and coming home for the first time, but I don't remember that, so it was weird again. There was only one homie I was supposed to see that I didn't, so overall, it was a pretty eventful trip. The bars are boring as ever, but its who you are with thats important, right?

I saw two movies over break which is crazy rare for me. I haven't seen a movie since like July. Anyway, I saw "Walk the Line" on Thanksgiving, and I thought the story itself was just ok, it was pretty much any rockstars story- I was struggling, got famous, had all this new money which I thought could replace me with my family, got into drugs, almost destroyed my career, got out of drugs, then yay, everything is good again. The acting was great though and I thought Reese looked great as a brunette!

The other movie I saw was "Just Friends." It was weird b/c I kinda related a bit to the main character. Not in that I fell in love with the hot chic in HS and she denied me, but in that I left, went to LA, got into the music business, and then visited home only to find it still the same (see above). Too bad I don't look like Ryan Renolyds, I'd be hott, I'd never leave home. haha

It was nice to see the fam, but I definately ate enough for about 7 people on Thanksgiving. Booooo. And I got sick too, but I swear its b/c they allow smoking in the bars out there! Everytime I went out, I felt so congested by the end of the night! Probably didn't help that it was 16 degrees and I no longer own a winter coat.

When I got back to LA, my friend that picked my up from the airport informed me that she isn't cutting it out here and is going to move back to Washington. That makes me so sad b/c shes probably one of the best friends I've made out here! I hope something good happens, like I win the lottery and give her some money to stay b/c I really don't want her to go :(

I've been such a sack of crap this week. I stayed home from work one day b/c I was sick and other than that, I come home and lay around all night. I worked out once, I suck. I think I'm going to ask for a gym membership for my b-day and I'm way excited about it. I know running outside burns more calories and all that, but when I was at home, I got on the treadmill and knocked out 5 miles before I knew it. That rules. Plus I can do other things and I don't have to buy warmer workout clothes since its getting colder out here. Yes, 60 degrees is now chilly to me.

I missed Grey's Anatomy on Sun night b/c I was on a plane. I was pissed b/c its pretty much the greatest show out right now, but I found out my awesome brother recorded it for me and is sending it out. My awesome brother also took me and my friends to hungover breakfast on Sunday morning. We went to Bongo Room, formerly Room 12 if anyone knows it as that. They had crazy food, I got the banana white chocolate macadamian nut pancakes. They were so rich, I could barely eat half. Heather got some pumpkim pancakes that she swore tasted just like pumpkin pie, or something... Anyway, it was awesome food, but way overpriced. Well, I guess it could be, it was packed in there, but I would have been just as happy at White Palace. But I dont think I'm aloud to go back there. Heather does not allow it... but hey, atleast I would have been sober this time!

If anyone didn't know this already, I hate Gemma Ward. I think she looks like an alien, and I don't really have a reason for hating her, but I do.

I'm off to watch the OC and try to find some food.

I hope you have the time of your life.

2005-11-20T02:42:00.000-08:00

First, foremost, and most importantly, ever, ever, ever:
Green Day mother fuckin owns this entire planet and my soul. Period. Yes, I know I took care of the period with the actual dot, but it needed to be reiterated.
Even though I'm broke as a joke (and, contrary to popular belief, not living off my parents still), I went out and bought "Bullet in a Bible" this week. For the slow folks, thats Green Day's new concert DVD. As I watched it for the first time, I fell in love over and over and over again.
Its everything you could hope a rock n roll band would put out. Its raw, unscripted, real... and its only fault is that it isn't longer.
Ok, putting myself in an objective persons shoes, this DVD could be a whole lot better. But being me, and being a huge GD fan, I love it, I haven't stopped watching it since I got it, and thank god they included a live CD with it, b/c it has been accompanying me on runs, car rides, and laying at the beach since! I mother fucking love GD, and I don't care what you think.

Ok, moving on...

I can't remember what my last post was about, and I can't be pissed to go back and look, so here... I ran into "Taylor" from the OC. She gorgeous and nice and I do not like where her character is going at all. I guess I'm used to it now, but for those that care, here's the celebs I've run into recently:
Ryan Cabrera
Shane West
Benji,Joel, and Billy from Good Charlotte
Hil Duffster
Joss Stone
Eve
Nicky (who played bitchy girl "Jess" on last season OC)
The previousle mentioned "Taylor" from the OC
Jamie from American Hi-Fi (one of the nicest guys ever)
Bryce from Lost Prophets (Ditto)
Dad from "The War at Home", better known as Pheobe's cop bf on Friends
Har Mar Superstar (would have never picked him out of a crowd of two, but was pointed out to me)
Davey Havok (Happy 30th!!)

Moving on, I hung out with Katie tonight, she rules. We went to a party at a club, blah blah blah, whatever... but as we were making plans for the night, she tells me that she has to run to her friend Wes's house first b/c he wants her to hear his new CD. Ok, fine, whatever. So, she calls me back later and informs me that Wes will be coming out with us and since she loves his Hummer (yes, the car you dirty bastards!), he will be driving and coming to pick me up on the way. Fine, cool, I don't have to drive, yay! So, then she asks if I know him, Wes from "Puddle of Mudd." My first thought, ohhhhh shit, B is NOT gonna like this! Thankfully, it didn't pan out. I'm sure he's a nice guy and all, but.... yeah, you know.

Anyway, so we went out, saw B, he was making out with this chic, that sucks, but oh well, whatever... they left together. K, anyway, moving on...

Holy crap was it nice out today! It was 85 degrees! In the middle of November! Insane! That's a lot of exclamation marks, but anyway, it was 85, so I decided to hit the beach. I went and laid out in Santa Monica, short and tee of course, wasn't warm enough for a swim suit! Then I went for a walk along the path, I ended up in Venice Beach, where I FINALLY GOT TO SEE A CALIFORNIA SUNSET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
If you can't tell, I was unbelievably excited! It was so beautiful, bright orange slipping into the water. I could take pics of sunsets every day, alas, I didn't have my camera with me. And then I walked along and people watched and I'm just so in love with Cali and its diversity. I honestly believe that love is the greatest thing and that you should fall in love daily. Well today, I fell in love with the following today (mostly at the beach):
Freaks and Geeks
Lesbians and gays who aren't afraid to show their love in public (and interacial couples too I suppose)
Clear skys
Sun shining and Sunsets of course
Independant beach booths that sell homemade goods
People that jam out together on the beach, I saw a huge group of steel drums and guitars just jamming out together at sunset time
Green Day, which you might have gotten earlier
Green Day Live Music
Green Day DVD
Green Day's old school music
Green Day "Hitchin' A Ride"
Green Day "King. For. A. Day!"
Friends that you don't talk to for a month, but randomly get on the phone with and its like you spent the entire last week together, like nothings changed in your friendship at all
Rediscovering punk- bands I listened to all day- Sex Pistols, Green Day, Social D, etc.
Billie Joe's eyes
Singing aloud and dancing in my car
Puppies
Accents, even though I've been told I lost mine :(

So, ends up I've gone out the past 5 nights in a row. I didn't know this til it was pointed out to me tonight. Whoops! I'm staying in the next two and then I fly home to Chicago for Thanksgiving. Omg, thats gonna be insane!!!!!!! I'm hearing that I might not be seeing everyone as planned and that everyone is not that excited for my arrival, but ya know, whatever. Tues- went to Jesse's to play beer pong b/c his bday was the day before, but we didn't end up going out to celebrate that night.

Wed I went to see Moving Units at the Avalon, Lizzy hooked me up with a free vip ticket, she rules. Speaking of Lizzy, she called me out this week on being "relentlessly logical." HAHAHAHAHA, one of the greatest things someone has said about me in awhile. Atleast I think so.

Thurs- Loose Tooth and then Spider. Both sucked majoy balls. But I ran into B that day, RANDOMLY! He turns me into a different person, so I pretty much saw him, made eye contact, put my head down and ran away. Oh well.

Fri- Tokio, for a little it, but then Leslie and I ended up hitting up IHOP. We had a great, long convo about life and shit. Leslie is awesome, I love that girl. Even if she is cheese. Munster cheese that is. Anyway, during our convo that night and one I had the next day with a friend, I came to realize that 1) I'm really happy with the choices I've made in my life and who I am as a person, and 2) I feel bad for a lot of people I know. No one I know has a terrible life, but some are definately comfortable, but scared of change or pushing themselves to acheive a dream or whatnot and I really feel bad for them! Ok, I don't really know how to sum it up in the right words, but basically I believe there are two types of people, those who dream and those who chase their dreams. Right now, I'm chasing mine, and that makes me happy. I am not a person to be envious of at all, b/c what I am doing, anyone else and their dog can do. Its just sad that what I'm doing it considered daring. Who would have ever thought moving away from the familiar and safe to try and fulfill your dreams would be a daring thing to do. I think if you want something, you should go for it, and thats that. And if you don't, then you can't complain about how your life sucks. Please, unless you actually try to change it, don't fucking bitch about your life! Life is good, life is beautiful, enjoy it and make the most out of it! The best laid plans may never work out, so roll with it.

Sat night- see above.

Billie Joe is so fucking HOTTTTTTTTTTTTT, why can't he fix those teeth! (and his hair is too long right now) My god, I wanna do him. Yup! Yes, I'm aware he's been married for 11 years and has two kids. I think that's the greatest thing ever. He' talked about how his marriage almost fell apart during the making of AI. The fact that they managed to hang on and work it out is the greatest thing ever and makes me respect him ever more. How sad is it that these days people are applauded for being able to stay married. Man, the divorce rate sucks! I say if two people are in love, they should be able to marry. The awesomest gay guy sits behind me at work, I love him, he's fab, him and his bf are so cute!

Ummmmmmmmm, I can't remember the other things I wanted to talk about, so... with that... a free for all, fuck em all... I'm out.

Because of you...

2005-11-14T23:01:00.000-08:00

Teenage girls finally have a good role model in pop music. Blender finally knows whats up!

The best things in life are free, but you can give them to the birds and bees, I want CLOTHES!!!

2005-11-13T14:14:00.000-08:00

My "what I want now" post part 3(?)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Not cold enuf in LA, but if I was still in Chicago, this in chocolate:

(Ree, I swear you better buy this and let me wear it when I'm home!!!)

I think this is going to be worn on New Years, b/c i have a white skirt with silver sequins that would look adorable with it (this one is bought already):

It'd be cute with this (but id never waste my money on it):

Old Navy, reversible fur vest:

Definately want this. But to be worn as a scarf, not as a wrap:

So sessy:

I fell in love with a camo mini at old navy a couple summers ago, didnt buy it and regretted it ever since. I think I will end up buying this, maybe in two months:

This would be cute in the chocolate color:

I want a red satin dress to wear on xmas, but if I dont find one, Im thinking this in red with black pants and red heels (and cardigan of course, again the arms thing):

Or maybe this for new years or a holiday party, its kinda 80's looking, but I think its so cute:

Bday? But my boobs would NEVER fit in it... aka, cute but not purchasing:

Hard to tell from pic, but the red top is glittery:

Grey, with jeans:

Crochet tights:

Again, would be cute for a holiday party:

Perfect for a night out, with jeans (if i didnt hate my arms that is):

I love mittens, and the balls just make these 10 times cuter:

Bought:

Part of a jewelry spree last week:

Just got email that this is finally being shipped:

ok enuf, yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy, now i wish i had money!!! haha

(ps- all places in properties if not already mentioned)

This is for dreaming, drinking and living.... and dreams of California!

2005-11-12T02:56:00.000-08:00

Take it as happy, not sad:

I've been dreaming of waking up happy under the sun,
In the smog and the traffic and dreams of California,
This lonely life takes to I-80 to try and forget,
The people and friends that forgot about me when I left,

I'm still finding home,
I'm finding my heart, my head,
The reason's why I left,

Cause this is for dreaming,
This is for leaving,
This is you picking up the pieces when I'm gone,
This is to drinking,
This is to living,
This is to packing up my shit and moving on,
I'm moving on,

I've been dreaming of lying down naked next to you,
Under stars on a blanket under the Los Angeles moon,
As we sit with our thoughts and watch the planes fly by,
It's nights like this that I look at you, I was born to be alive,

My western home,
My eastern heart,
The middle is my home,

Cause this is for dreaming,
This is for leaving,
This is you picking up the pieces when I'm gone,
This is to drinking,
This is to living,
This is to packing up my shit and moving on,
I'm moving on,

I don't mind,
Setting these traps for you, to fall into, cause I,
I will be there, when you need to be rescued,
I'll rescue, I will rescue you,

Cause this is for dreaming,
This is for leaving,
This is you picking up the pieces when I'm gone,
This is to drinking,
This is to living,
This is to packing up my shit and moving on,
I'm moving on.

1) new. fav. song. it pretty much describes my life right now. in a good way!
download here:
http://s58.yousendit.com/d.aspx?id=2IFWDQJWD9L7E10PWRO3LD0O2Z

2) the dj played dramarama tonight! i thought i was gonna spin right off this earth! ;lkjsdlf;kjads;lkfja;lskdjfa;lksjdflkjahdfglkjahsdj

3) my bosses let me out at one today, but paid me for the whole day, yay!!

4) i cant wait to go home for thanksgiving in a week and a half, this is the longest time ive ever been away from home and i miss everyone and am so excited to hang out with them all!

5) I can't wait to go shopping with my mom when I get home... and see my dad! my god... he moved from Italy to the US when he was 22, I just moved across the country, I can't even imagine what my poor father has gone through in his life.

6) I haven't seen "BJ" is over 2 weeks :( x 93485093485209384

7) Ok, I'm wasted, time to go to sleep. Yay for spending $5 tonight!! I rock :)

Checkmarks.

2005-11-06T04:17:00.000-08:00

Well check it off, my car got broken into tonight. FUCK!
It was broken into in front of my friends house. We walked to 7-11 not 30 mins earlier, but I didn't notice anything then. It was when I went to get into my car, about 3am, and noticed that the lock on the driver's side door wouldn't open, that I realized something had happened. Fast forward an hour later, and a visit to the police station, ends up it was an "attemped burglary" but fortunatly nothing was taken. I had to wake my poor parents up in the middle of the night, who informed me to report it for insurance purposes. Now I'm going to have to make an apt to get the lock fixed, what a pain in the ass!!!! I so hate people right now!

On a lighter note, ends up Paris Hilton is getting around town just fine in her disguise. My friends spotted her today at the Farmer's Market in a brown wig, but forutnately for her, not many people recognized her, yay Paris!

Between my car getting broken into tonight and locking myself out of my own apartment tonignt... oh yeah, and having the hickups right now... oh, and having a cop tell you that he hopes you aren't driving due to your dialated pupils... life sucks as of this moment!!!! Whatever, so over it... have a good night :)

The space between insane and insecure.

2005-10-27T00:43:00.000-07:00

Holy... YUM!

Im really pissed about missing them now.

Oh, and you should definately go watch the 9 min version of Jesus of Suburbia here. The 14 min version should be out soon.

Just b/c its funny...

2005-10-18T20:52:00.000-07:00

EW review: Ashlee's 'I Am' dreadful

It may be clunky and comical, but for Ashlee Simpson, "I Am Me" is probably a profound statement of defiance -- her way of standing up for herself after her onstage fiascoes and, by insinuation, taking some responsibility for them.

The title is also an extension of her shtick. Sure, she screws up, doesn't always sing in key or dance well, and can't decide on her hair color. But that's okay, because she's a regular person, just like you and me! You have a problem with that?

Not surprisingly, an air of defensiveness and self-pity hangs over Simpson's second album. "Beautifully Broken" ("It seems like yesterday that my world fell from the sky") and "Catch Me When I Fall" allude to life after her post-Saturday Night Live lip-synch train wreck, even if the wound was self-inflicted. In "L.O.V.E.," she implores "all my girls" to gather 'round for support; in "Dancing Alone," she asserts that "it's my life, I'm doing fine."

"Hollywood sucks you in, but it won't spit me out," she semi-snarls in "Boyfriend," which finds Simpson rhyming "for sure" and "my tour," certainly two phrases of equal importance in her universe.

But who is this "me," anyway? Little Ashlee was, of course, never the "bad-ass girl" she claimed to be on her debut, 2004's gangly "Autobiography," which proved definitively that ersatz punk was the new middle-of-the-road pop.

"I Am Me" does at least confirm that she's a producer's dream: a singer of no discernible personality who can be altered to suit the demands of the marketplace. With its shameless knockoffs of Gwen Stefani (the cheerleader bop of "L.O.V.E."), U2 (the stadium-rock throb of "Dancing Alone"), and Fiona Apple (the piano ballad "Catch Me When I Fall"), "I Am Me" practically amounts to a NOW tribute album. Every song feels like a retread of some hit you've heard before, somewhere.

Blaring like Karen O one moment, crooning like a husky version of her sister the next, Simpson (who's listed as a co-writer on the songs) is a pop changeling -- if, in fact, that's her we're actually hearing. The way technology works, you never know.

For sure, Simpson's Svengali, John Shanks, is one cunning producer. The new-wave-y bounce of "Coming Back for More," the funk-punk shimmy of "Boyfriend" (the disc's grabbiest song by far), and the wide-screen hook of "Beautifully Broken" are like studio exercises, ways for Shanks to practice his craft and prepare for his next jobs. (Recently, he's also pumped up Sheryl Crow, Liz Phair, and Alanis Morissette.)

As for the reality-show star at the heart of "I Am Me," it turns out the title song is actually about a breakup, with Simpson telling the insensitive guy who dumped her, "I am me/And I won't change for anyone." Even he must have found that line ironic.

EW Grade: C-

http://www.cnn.com/2005/SHOWBIZ/Music/10/18/ew.mus.simpson/index.html

Like hell we are anxiously waiting.

2005-10-14T03:37:00.000-07:00

No more drunk posting!

I lied my face off

2005-10-12T23:25:00.000-07:00

I'm not a huge fan of message tees, I think they're very 2 years ago, but... how cute is this?

I want that. Anyway... I found out that a friend of mine got married a few weeks ago b/c he knocked up a girl. That's interesting...

I skipped out on going to see Butch tonight b/c I'm broke.

I have a friend in town, we will be heading out tomorrow night. She wants to go to all these live music venues, but I don't want to go see some shitty band, I usually only go to them if there is someone I wanna see. I think we'll prolly head to Loose Tooth and Joseph's tomorrow night and maybe over to Spider for a bit.

I get paid on Friday. Every single last penny is going to rent. Yay. Not.

I ate so, so bad today. I'm pretty sure I gained about 5 lbs. Set back city! Especially b/c yesterday I saw that dude, Freddie I think, from that VH1 celebrity diet show, and he kept talking about how America is just getting fatter. That didn't help me much :(

Oh, so while I was out for my run last night, who did I see? Jeremy Piven! CHICAGO WHAT?! I caught him right as I was passing him, but I wanted to turn around and yell, "Chicago Love!" But I didn't. That's the second time I've seen him this year. He's so stalking me. Along with Ben from Yellowcard and Jason Biggs, leave me alone boys!

Half our office is going to be out tomorrow for Jewish holiday. My boss is so funny, she came up to me today and asked if I would be in tomorrow and I said, "Yes, I'm not Jewish." And she was like "Phew, I didn't know the right way to go about asking if you were Jewish." haha, she's so funny. We may be going to some American Idol party next week at Cabana Club, I can't wait :)

Girls don't like boys, girls like [shoes] and [handbags]!!

2005-10-09T16:20:00.000-07:00

I want, I want, I want, I want, I want, I want, I WANT!!!

All places are in properties. Maybe this should be called I want, but I can't afford... boo :(

I used to long for time alone

2005-10-02T19:07:00.000-07:00

I love when I haven't written in a bit and someone mentions it to me. I had no idea anyone even reads this thing! (hey kate!)

What I've been up to... I've been at my new job for 2 weeks now. And those two weeks have flown! They seemed like two days. I can't really talk about much b/c of confidentiality issues, but I will say that I like it so far. I got introduced to the whole floor on Friday, everyone seems really nice. And I made a friend, me and the receptionist went to lunch twice together last week. I try to bring my lunch everyday b/c I can't afford to eat out, but when you get in late and are thus too tired to wake up in the am, it happens.

I think our apt is pretty much finished. Steph is a decorating machine! I joke with her that she can forget about turning on our electric but has time to draw up floor plans of where everything should go. She made us some wall art that turned out pretty cool. Its three big rectangles, like full length mirror sized, and she covered them in fabric, one dark purple, one medium, and one light, and hung em above our couch. They look pretty cool. Shes going to do the same thing on the other wall, but just going across the middle and then hang black and white pics of ourselves on it. And then make couch pillows out of the leftover fabric. I feel bad betrating pink, but purple's really in right now and I do like it. We bought cute flowered coasters at Urban yesteray that match the living room. I also bought two purple shirts hahaha We tried to do some shoe shopping, but it was unsuccessful. I think my next shoe purchase is going to be a pair of black low-top chucks, which I'm going to cut up to look like Mary Janes. Yay!

And then we went for Sushi... mmmmmmmmmsushi! It was this place on Melrose, just west of La Brea, owned and operated by three women. They had the best California roll I've ever tasted. Typing this is making me hungry for more! I love sushi, I want it now and tomorrow and every day! As soon as I find out someone else is coming to visit, I'm making more Koi reservations!

From my outting yesterday, a few things I bought:
Old Navy, cream colored with dark grey and gold stipes, cuter on:

Old Navy too

Target, sooo cute on!

Urban:

this one in purple, on sale for $10!!

I wore it out last night, it was really cute.

Thursday night we went out to Forbidden City and Spider. We danced and got some free bags from Jane mag, I had a lot of fun. Friday night I went to Alkaline Trio/My Chem with Kitty. Alkaline Trio was so good, I love them so so so much. My Chemical sucked, but they are terrible live and I knew that. But it was probably the best of all their shitty shows I've seen. They vip section for this show was INSANE! It took up like three sections (sports arena)!! I couldn't believe it.
Last night, Sat, I went with some new friends to Vanguard. We danced all frickin night, it was such a blast. Besides the fact that it was about 200 degrees in there and the DJ sucked so bad... it was still great time. And then we hit up Dennys, which caused me to have the worst stomach pains I've ever experienced in my whole entire life. No more Dennys for me!

I think thats about it for now kids! I know I said this before, but I'm really going to try and be better about updating! Just yell at me if I haven't for a few days :)

I almost forgot my best purchase of the weekend!!!

My other one crapped out and I've been dying for about two weeks without one, so I went and bought it today and I couldnt be happier! I have about 2,000 songs on it so far. I'm taking it out for its first outting right now!

oh, since I missed it... HAPPY BIRTHDAY TERRI!!!!!!!!!!!!!! loveloveloveyou!

Roll with it

2005-09-14T18:28:00.000-07:00

I got a job. Next week I become a full-time working girl!
Im kinda exciting. I wanna go in there and take that place by storm! And I will!

Free to drink martinis and watch the sun rise

2005-09-12T19:02:00.000-07:00

The longer I let this thing go, the harder it is to come back to b/c I have more and more things to say. I would limit it to just the important stuff, but its not like i write it down prior to making an entry, its just random stream of thought from my head, so here goes...

My mom and bro came to visit, we bought apartment stuff and lots of unnecessary apartment stuff b/c my mom said we needed it, like a vacuum. Yes, we would eventually need a vacuum, but I didn't think it was necessary to get one the second day she was here. She obviously did though and vacuumed close to every day she was here. What a crazy woman. My bro really liked LA, I think. We went to the Getty, which he really liked, I actually really liked it too, but the photography exhibit they have now is just kinda eh... Took em through the hills, of course onto Mulholland for some pics, and over to the Hollywood sign. I think the highlight of their trip for me (besides seeing them of course!) was dinner at Koi. My god, everything I put in my mouth was AMAZING! We had yellow tail carpaccio and spicy tuna on crunchy rise to start, and then I had a cali roll and a rock shrimp tempura handroll, which was just unbelievable. I want to eat there every night of my life. No wonder Paris is photographed coming out of there like 3 times a week when shes in town. If I had her money, I'd definately live there too. We also went to The Ivy, it was good, but not amazing, and definately over-priced.

I didn't do too much clothes shopping, just needed some new jeans and some work wear. I have a job offer, but I'm not sure I want to take it. It is for a small amount of money and honestly, when I found out how much the people make that I would be working for, I wanted to laugh. And its far. I want to hold out for something better, but I need to start making money like yesterday. So, I'm not sure what I'm going to do yet. I have another interview tomorrow, so maybe I will be able to decide after that. I really, really wanna work at ASCAP, but dude won't call me back! Grrrr, I'm going to go show up there... not really, but I wish that were a sane and acceptable way of showing you really want the job, oh well.

BJ is back in town and I got to see him the other night. I seriously just want to eat the boy, he's so cute! I didn't talk to him much, but thats ok, I got to look all I wanted (ok, I also so crazy here, but, lets move on...) Steph drank a bit too much that night, so I doubt I'll get her out for awhile.

Ummmmmm........... I dunno, I miss having friends to go out with, to go shopping with, to go out for lunch or dinner with, to hang out and watch the OC with... I hope I start meeting people soon. That's another drawback of the place i have the offer from- I'd be working for two ladies and thats it. Both are older, no friend-making capabilities there! Ok, back to the OC, I missed the first episode!!! Steph forgot to get our power switched into our name, and they though no one was living here, and they were obviously not receiving money, so on Thurs afternoon, they shut it off! I was very not happy to say the least. The only casualty was my ice cream sandwhiches in the freezer and some fruit in the fridge, but it was definately not a fun experience any less. I heard most of LA lost power today, we weren't one of them, thank god. I don't think I could handle twice in one week. So, Terri updated me on the OC, but I'd still have liked to have seen it. We may have not lost power in our apt, but a lot of the street lights went out in our area, which did not make for a fun trip to the store. It took me about 45 mins to go what should have taken about 15. People are idiots when it comes to this kind of stuff. "Oooh, the stop light is flashing, what do I do. I'll just sit here and make all the people pile up behind me." I swear LA has the most unintelligent drivers ever.

Ooooh, I got new bed sheets! They are sooo pretty. They are dark red striped, 400 thread count. Good luck ever getting me out of bed now!

Ok, that's all I can think of for now. Time to go for a walk. My i-pod head phones crapped out, so I had to buy some new ones at the 99cent store today.

Ok take two, now I'm appartent going to see the Penfifteen Club and Marko DJing at Knitting Factory tonight, so I definately gotta get runnin... I'll try and be better about updating!! There's alot of pics I wanna get up. Later <3

You don't do it on purpose, but you make me shake

2005-08-27T22:50:00.000-07:00

(with laughter that is)

Two different convos today:

Laura: i have to pee
Laura: but last time i tried peeing, it hurt a LOT
Laura: so now i dont want to
Laura: haha
Me: stop having sex with bums!
Laura: psh
Me: chicago bums are dirty, trust me
Laura: i think i have a bug bite down there or something
Me: omg
Laura: always the worst
Me: i do not wish to continue this conversation
Laura: hahahaha

Brit: BUT HE LOOKS GREAT
Me: i wanna eat his face
Brit: and sit on it?
Brit: hahaa

These highly amused me:

I just highly amused by everything today. Except bugs and spider webs. They make me want to join a gym. Gross. I was about to step up onto the sidewalk from the street today when I saw a very large cockroach moving on the sidewalk, so I moved to the side and went to step up again, but he moved back into my path. Repeat two more times. All the while, I'm blocking a limo from moving through the intersection and he could obviously not see why I was dancing in the street. I hope he prayed for me. haha In addition, I saw about 5 other cockroaches, about 4 crickets, which I swear to god fly out here, and got about 10 spiderwebs to the face. Yuck. Bally's here I come! Too bad I can't afford it :(

My mom and brother come to visit on Wednesday. I hope it cools down a bit before then or else I'm not gonna wanna do shit. I think I'm going to make reservations at The Ivy and Koi. I can't wait! mmmmmmmmmmmmm

One Sweet World

2005-08-27T14:38:00.000-07:00

Too funny not to post:

CHARLOTTESVILLE, VA

Dave Matthews, the 38-year-old singer and guitarist for the multi-platinum group The Dave Matthews Band, announced Tuesday that he is no longer into himself.

"I used to be a hardcore Dave Matthews fan," said Matthews on the porch of his Virginia home. "I had all my records and posters. I was so blown away by everything I did—especially my live performances. I remember me and my buddies used to drive for hours just to go to one of our shows."

Matthews, who formed the Dave Matthews Band in 1991, is perhaps best known for the hit songs "Crash Into Me" and "The Space Between."

"Me and my band are still okay, but I feel like I've grown out of us," Matthews said. "Back when I was in the college charts, we were about all I listened to, but I guess I'm at the point in my life where my music just doesn't speak to me."

Matthews admitted that most of his current Dave Matthews listening is confined to overhearing a hit single on a jukebox or PA system. However, while doing dishes last weekend, he tried listening to 1998's Before These Crowded Streets, an album he had not heard in over two years. The singer admitted that by the fourth track, he was barely even listening.

"It sounded like this sort of worldbeat background drone," Matthews said. "So I took it off and put on some Stevie Ray Vaughan instead."

"Rock music with a violin? I don't know," Matthews added. "Seemed cool once."

Although Matthews continues to attend every single performance of his band, and even his own solo appearances, he claims it's "more out of obligation" than out of passion for his music.

Matthews said that while he once felt exhilarated whenever his group launched into one of their famous prolonged jam sessions, he can now "barely sit through them." Said Matthews: "Lately, I try to vary my routine so I don't get bored on stage. Usually, if there's a long solo, I'll go get a beer or check out the T-shirts."

Matthews even feels isolated from fans with whom he once felt a strong bond, disparaging them as "lame." He also admits that the older he gets, the more out of place he feels around "kids in their Dave Matthews phase."

"I used to talk for hours about my music or spend a whole night in a DMB chatroom," Matthews said. "But now, the people at the shows seem like such geeks, standing there with their elaborate taping equipment. They're really, really young, too. What do I have in common with them? They're just a bunch of kids who need someone to look up to. Why would I look up to me? I'm so 1997."

Yet for all his disenchantment with the Dave Matthews Band, he'll still "probably check me out at Farm Aid in September." Added Matthews: "If I'm even playing there this year. I don't even know. Dave Matthews—that is to say, me—just isn't where I'm coming from anymore."

Link to article so you stop crying

Sing my soul to sleep and take me back to bed

2005-08-25T01:22:00.000-07:00

Everyone's caught on.

I was here:

I hate Gemma, but the dress is stunning, way to go Cavalli.

Wish I would've seen him instead of douche bag Kyle in Vegas.

Love her.

Gorgeous.

(not the tan)

Funny.

I love talented people... who also make yummy stuff!

Lastly, I saw David Hasselhoff today. He was eating at the Ivy. My life is complete, I can die happy now. hehe

While I'm young and while I'm able, all I wanna do is...

2005-08-17T23:41:00.000-07:00

Pictures, care of Shawna:

He amuses me. Pete, your pants are tight:

Look at Pete the leader and all the kids following!

I dont get the bass licking, I don't, but carry on doing it:

Words of wisdom, care of Kim*:

you can't live for other people. you can't let other people bring you down. you need to live your life for you, and be true to who you are. and if someone can't accept that, then maybe they weren't as important to your life as you once thought they were. if something makes you truly happy, don't worry so much about how others feel about it, because that wont matter in the long run. all that matters is if you're being true to yourself and doing things for you.

there are people who live in the shadows of others, and then there are people who create the shadows for others to follow under. which one are you?

Well said, Kimmie.

I feel like I have been abandoning my blog lately, kinda like abandoning a child! I've just been busy. Lots of moving this week. But, I'm so happy to finally be settled in a place for at least a year. All our neighbors seem awesome, so I'm excited. I had a little crazy experience the other night. I talked to Jonathan to see what he was doing for the night, but he informed me that he had en event to go to throw by Teen People Mag. So, I decide to venture over to Ameoba b/c I haven't been there in awhile and there was a cd I've been meaning to pick up. Well, I head to the parking garage and notice a whole lotta commotion. When I get out, I see that its the new Cabana Club and that its where the Teen People party is being held. I saw a ton of celebs, but probably most important in the celebrity totem pole right now- Miss Paris Hilton herself. I hate to say this, but in person, the girl is gorgeous. Flawless, glowing skin. I officially hate her. Hilary Duff's dress was blinding, Joel looked cute in his little emo glasses, quite a change from the hour I'd seen him before that. Ok, done.

The Here and Now (lost in the lights and the sound)

2005-08-12T17:19:00.000-07:00

Ok, so things are starting to pick up! (maybe I shouldn't say that in case I jinx myself, oh well..)

Big news- Steph and I got an apartment!!!! Oh god, I received the call yesterday from our lovely new landlord. He told us we got the place and that we can come and sign the lease on Saturday. We are probably going to move in over the course of next week. This is seriously the biggest weight off my chest, I'm so, so happy. And its such a cute place! Brand new carpeting, lots of light, big rooms. Only downside- no pool. Oh well, I'll have to make friends with the people next door or just make an effort to get my ass to the beach more. I spent some time in my pool today trying to get the most out of the last few days of it. So much for the pool toys I bought, maybe I can use them as inflatable furniture! Haha Also great- the location! We are in West Hollywood, right off Melrose. I never realized it, but when we stopped by the place last night, I noticed we are steps from Dolce. Not that I can afford to eat there, but whatever. Steph and I are just so excited, we couldn't be happier.

So, of course we went out to celebrate last night. We went out for Tapas with Steph's man and an old friend of hers that just moved close to LA. Tapas + Pitcher of Sangria= so good. Then they decided they wanted to hit up a hookah bar, so we came back to Westwood and did just that. The place was crazy, loud, and fun. The hookah was interesting. I didn't even want to try it b/c I knew it was still tobacco, but they told me it wasn't bad like cigarettes, like no tar and stuff like that grossness. So, I tried it, it was interesting. We had Jasmine, I think next time I wanna try a fruit flavor.

So yeah, new apartment, tapas, sangria, hookah... yesterday was quite a day. Today we went bed shopping. We found an area we deemed "matress row" on Pico and I think we are both very happy, or will be soon, with our choices and prices. Then Steph scoured the Ikea catalog and I think we have all of our furniture picked out too! Everything is going to match, we are going to have the cutest apartment and I can't wait!

Ok, enough for now... oh wait, Kitty and I are going to GC tomorrow, so excited! I think we might head to Basque or Shelter tonight, not sure yet... Later!

*wavehimike*

I'm quitting life

2005-08-10T16:00:00.000-07:00

I never have and will never understand people who are just rude. What satisfaction do you get our of making other people miserable or making their lives more difficult? I have encountered so many of these people lately, I'm dumbfounded. Why do so many people feel above others? So you have a job and hold the power to hire someone, doesn't give you the right to treat that person like some dumb, uneducated idiot! And so you have an apartment for rent and you get to decide who gets it, that doesn't give you the right to make that person's experience more difficult that it already is, and definately doesn't excuse the common descency of returning a phone call. On top of all that, I think I've been the victim of reverse discrimination. Well not reverse, b/c its all discrimination, but yeah... Its two thousand fucking five!

I'm just so disappointed in the world and people lately. And even more on top of that, I have become out of sight out of mind to people. Oh well, I guess.

Be nice to one another, I promise you will feel better about yourself in the end.

Don't you feed me lies about some idealistic future

2005-08-08T11:20:00.000-07:00

"I'm seeing a Buddhist about it, but not just any Buddhist, the Dalai Lama."

hehe... Well, this forward was sent to me, its supposedly what the Dalai Lama has to say about 2005, but we've all heard these before, and I think most are pretty good lessons, so I'm gonna post em here:

I'll give you anything, anything, anything

2005-08-07T03:32:00.000-07:00

Long time no update. Real quick, here we go:

- Spent two lovely, lovely days in San Diego. If we didn't love LA so much, we'd be moving to a beach house in San Diego asap.

- Went to a dueling piano bar with Steph's mom and step-dad. They brought her mom up on stage for "Joy to the world (Jeremiah was a bullfrog)." If you don't know what they do during that song, I won't ruin it for you, I've witnessed it twice now, its so fun. Steph said she'd never laughed so hard in her life. It was great,great fun. My voice was pretty much gone when we left b/c I only didn't know two of the songs they played- country, go figure. Oh, and it was their "big ass beer night" It ruled!

- Been apartment hunting like a madwoman. Can't wait to finally get moved into some place for longer than a few weeks.

- Had an interview on Friday, went well.

- Sara called me today, so nice to catch up with friends. Need to call Angie back again.

- Parents called me from the WI State Fair where they go every year with a insane amount of friends. They were having a blast as always and I realized that when I'm my parents age, if I have it half as good as they do, my life will have been a complete and utter success. I don't think you can find anything better than my parents- they are great people, they have great friends, they travel like mad, still party like theyre in their 20's (but without it being like those weird creapy old people who think they are still 20), and have so, so much to show for working hard their whole lives. People always say that they don't wanna be like their parents when they grow up, well, I wanna be exactly like mine. I was talking to my mom about stuff that's been going on lately, and she told me "Friends come and go, but your family will always be here for you." I told her that I knew that, it was something I learned the hard way the first week of school, my sophomore year of college. And to this day, I still know its true. When I left for Cali, they told me if it doesn't work out, you can always come home. And I know I can.

Thats about it, life is good. Be inspired, be willing to take some chances, and don't let other people parallel park for you. :)

If God is a DJ, life is a dance floor

2005-08-02T00:48:00.000-07:00

Wedding Crashers is the greatest movie I have ever seen in my entire life! I seriously didn't stop laughing for the first half of the movie. If you don't go see it, you're stupid. And I'm not kidding, you are stupid. Oh, and I'm going to marry Vince Vaughn.

Steph and I are leaving for San Diego tomorrow. I can't wait, I'm so excited. We are going to take surfing lessons! SURFING LESSONS! Aggghhhh, so so excited. I doubt I'll be any good, and I'm sure as hell going to feel like an idiot for the beach part, but whatever, I'm going to surf! And eat sushi and get tanner (with a massive amount of lotion applied so I don't age!!) and read and... djlaskjdflajs just so happy :)

Oh, and I got my concert tix in the mail today which also made me happy! Kitty and I decided we are going to wear disguises. She is going to be a mexcian man complete with mustache and sombrero and I'm going to be a dutch girl with wooden clogs and blonde braids. Hahaha

La la la, I'm off to bed :)

IF GOD IS A DJ, LIFE IS A DANCE FLOOOOOOOOOR, you get what your given, its all how you use it... If God is a DJ, life is a dance floor, GET YOUR ASS ON THE DANCE FLOOR!!!

I'm rockin steady to the beat in my head

2005-07-28T22:38:00.000-07:00

It took about 2 hours to drive back from Pomona today because of traffic. I decided yesterday that I was going to head to the beach tonight to watch the sunset over the ocean and finally put my feet in the Pacific. Well, when I got in view of the setting sun, I noticed it was setting too far north, so it was going over the hills of Malibu instead of into/over the ocean. So I decided to chase it to see if I could get around the hills on PCH before it set. No such luck. So essentially I drove to the beach to watch the sun set over the mountains. Odd. I also didnt put my feet in the water yet. Soon, most likely in San Diego next week.

Plans for the week:
Run/workout
Play my guitar
Lay by the pool
Read Harry Potter (no, not Pooter!)
Get a library card, reread Valley of the Dolls, get Shadow of the Dolls
Catch up on weekly magazine reading
Rent the first season of Entourage
Browse Ameoba
Sit at Starbucks or the Coffee Bean for hours on end, drowning myself in iced tea

That's about it! I'm so glad my summer is finally starting!

Oh, Happy Bday, Brit! You are a great girl with a huge heart, I love ya, have a great day and a beer for me! I'm off to passout...

I let my music take me where my heart wants to go

2005-07-28T01:54:00.000-07:00

I hear he's engaged...

Ugh, I can't wait until tomorrow is over.

Cant buy me love

2005-07-25T14:54:00.000-07:00

But can buy me some radio playtime!

Sony got BUSTED! Big time. They have to pay $10m for payola. Who'd they pay to play? Jessica Simpson, Jennifer Lopez's "I'm Real" (in July 2001), Good Charlotte's "Hold On" (in November 2003), Franz Ferdinand's "Take Me Out" (in August 2004), more Good Charlotte, Gretchen Wilson, more Jessica Simpson in the form of "Take My Breath Away", again more Good Charlotte "I Just Wanna Live", Avril Lavigne "Don't Tell Me" and Maroon 5 "Sunday Morning".

Wow. Interesting fact- no one has ever spent a day in jail for payola although "individual violators, after being subject to a first citation, could face fines of as much as $10,000 and, if the Justice Department chose to prosecute, as much as a year in jail." Interesting.

In other music news:
7/25: Green Day heads up MTV video award nominees
U.S. punk-pop band Green Day captured eight nominations for "Boulevard of Broken Dreams" and "American Idiot" on Monday to lead nominees for the MTV Video Music Awards.
YAY!!!

But...
Rocker Gwen Stefani and rap artist Missy Elliott each won six nominations and the Irish band U2 had five.
Please go away, Gwen!

You prolly think this song is about you

2005-07-24T01:23:00.000-07:00

(take 2)

So, after searching for Mischa Barton's pearl, Chanel necklace the other day, I made the horrible mistake of hitting up Chanel.com tonight. Here's my current list of wants:

This is obviosly Dior, but I want it in the maroonish croc color:

I just wanna know who's gonna sport these first. Despite the fact that I love anything sparkly and anything stars, I think they're tacky:

This is from funkychunkyhandbags.com, I want the one of the girl playing guitar, naturally:

I remembered that I had a Nordstrom's gift card, so I pop in there today to pick up a new tube of my long pretty lashes. That pretty much made my day.

go ahead, sing it- "don't you, don't you, dooooooon't you!"

You know you shook me baby...

2005-07-22T22:43:00.000-07:00

So, Steph and I went to Forbidden City and then to Spider Club last night. Both were decorated very... stylishly.
Forbidden city had this gigantic buddha we sat next to, he was cool. Spider was a Moroccan theme, with two different rooms. The inside part was mostly VIP booths (hi ryan cabrera!) and a dance floor, and the other room was lounges with a retractable roof that was open (hi Bill Maher!, wait, what?) Anyway, for the first time since I was about 18, I felt the effects of 4 beers... and ... woohooooo!!! Steph was wasted and made some random balloons her new friends which entertained her the whole way home.

Check out the new MAC Rebelrock collection. Awesome stuff there! I did awesome, awesome eyes last night, though not too outrageous. I mixed dark silver/gray and did a little light gold over em. I thought it turned out really cool.

More cool make-up, Lancome's fall collection by face of Drew:

So, some stars (Nicole, Sienna, Ashlee) have been sporting 80's style denim vests lately. Ladies, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! If that trend comes back, I will laugh at each and every one of you fashion victims. Pics:

Just, ew.

I had some ideas for when I *cough* start my own clothing label *cough*. Two of these ideas, I discovered today, have already been used. I was quite sad when I realized. I know they were not the most original of ideas, but still... Well, one was that the labels on the clothes that tell you size, price, etc. were going to look like backstage/vip passes that you stick on. Saw that today on some jeans... :( The other was going to be blazers with angel wings spray painted on the back. Well, spray paint looking, and not a full screen print look. Something like the pink feathers on KFed's one blazer. Well, today, I saw this:

Mine would have been cuter, but still... the ideas out there. And yes, once again, I know it wasn't that original to begin with. Still makes me a little sad though.

This, however, would make me happy- if I were able to afford it:

Agggghhh, they are so girly and cute! I want, I want, I want!

Terri bought a new car yesterday. Here's pics:

Congrats T-bagg!

I should be studying, but I'm not! Haha, I can't wait til next Friday, I'm going to take a week off and do nothing but swim and run and read and drink iced tea! Oh, and Steph is taking me down to San Diego b/c her parents rented a beach house for the week. I think we are going to take some surfing lessons with her little sister, how cool is that?! I'm so excited. On another note, I'm starting to sound like Steph and I are a couple, aren't I? Haahahahaha, no, we are definately two girls who like boys. I can't wait to get working though and make some friends!

If you wanna... I might

2005-07-20T22:21:00.000-07:00

I don't know how its possible, but each day that goes by, my love and appreciation for music is growing by leaps and bounds. The girl I'm renting from subscribes to Rolling Stone, and we just got the new one in the mail today. If it didn't come directly to me free of charge, I wouldn't pick up the thing, I HATE Rolling Stone. Anyway, so I'm flipping through it and reading about Carlos Santana's upcoming album. Everyone knows that the man can play a mean guitar, but I've never been too, too interested in his stuff. Well, guests on his new album include Los Lonley Boys (also amazing guitar players) and a duet with Joss Stone and Sean Paul. Um, what? Joss and Sean Paul? Who would have ever thought to even put those two in a room together? They describe the song as "kind of a charanga with a little bit of the Clash in it." Carlos on guitar + Joss's soulful singing + Sean Paul's reggae vibe/voice + The Clash= I definately want to hear this song, if for no other reason than... well, how the hell is that going to sound?!

I need some new music. I grabbed Anniemal from EJ today. People in the industry have been talking about this chic for years, well, thats when I first heard of her... so this album better not disappoint me!

I was also reading an article in Billboard today that basically said: Groxster decsion- who cares? I agree, it doesn't matter. The dude also said that the big labels aren't doing shit and the music business is shifting into the hands of other players like... Apple, Yahoo, AOL, and Google... um, agreed! But good for them b/c if the labels aren't going to do shit, then its up to someone else to move forward. Obviously the new technologies that try to prevent digital sharing of the files aren't working- cd sales are down again and shocker- digital file sharing is skyrocketing. Wow, so suprising *rolls eyes* I feel bad for so many of the real artists these days. I liked how U2 admitted that there would be no U2 had they been trying to break into the business now instead of when they did. Ok, I could go on all night, so I'm gonna have to get off the music business now...

I talked to Jamie today which was so nice b/c I haven't been able to chat with her in awhile. Its always nice to be able to catch up with friends.

I used to love mags like Glamour and Cosmo, but lately I've more been reading ones like Elle, Vogue and In Style. And I think I like them a lot better. Maybe I'm just growing up. Ok, these are so not grown up, but I found 'em while browsing In Style:

How fricken cute are those?!

I don't know if I talked about this already, but during one of my daydreaming sessions while reading some fashion mag, I decided when I'm older I want to have Sunday night dinners with everyone, every week. And each week will have a different theme and it will rotate who makes the main meal, who does appetizers, dessert and drinks! How fun would that be?! I could go on forever about my ideas for this, but I won't. But seriously, it will happen, and it will be so much fun. And I will take pictures! I saw this on someone's blog the other day, and despite the fact that I've read many versions of it many times, it never fails to make me smile:

As we grow up, we learn that even the one person that wasn't supposed to ever let you down probably will. You will have your heart broken probably more than once and it's harder every time. You'll break hearts too, so remember how it felt when yours was broken. You'll fight with your best friend. You'll blame a new love for things an old one did. You'll cry because time is passing too fast, and you'll eventually lose someone you love.

So take too many pictures, laugh too much, and love like you've never been hurt because every sixty seconds you spend upset is a minute of happiness you'll never get back

So cute. Makes me wanna go out and do great things... which I will... now.

We've got crosses on our eyes, been walking into the walls again

2005-07-20T01:39:00.000-07:00

(you can skip the first two paragraphs)

Since I was little, I always had a couple different sets of friends. Ya know, like when I was 10, I had my friends from school, soccer, softball, the neighborhood and whatever else. I didn't realize it until high school, but I definately liked having my separate groups of friends, it ensured different view points, different activities, different converstions and the like. Well, recently some of the lines have merged and crossed and I don't like it at all. Among jealous feelings and trying to make sure I pay enough attention to each person, it denies me the ability to vent about things because they will just get back to whoever. I know, I know, shouldn't talk about people behind their backs, but thats not it at all. Its not necessarily that I have said anything bad, just something that someone doesn't need to hear.

As I was thinking about all that today (seriously, its amazing what you will think of while trying to study), I also realized that no one really knows me. Each of my friends and family members know part of me, but no one really knows everything. I somehow subconsciously hold myself back from showing things or talking about some things. And as lame as it is, I think it all stems back to my first heartbreak. I know! Lame, lame, lame!!! But, at that time, I had a very, very close knit group of friends who shared everything with each other. Well, it ended up that I was sharing my boyfriend with my cousin and didn't even know about it. Needless to say, I do not keep in touch with any of the people from that group. Yes, it was a long time ago, and people grow and change and drift apart, but I really think despite being young, the whole situation made me always hold a bit of myself back from other to ensure not getting hurt that bad again. And I haven't! So, go me... but yeah.

Back to meaningless stuff... I went and looked at an apt today. I will never, ever, EVER have it as good as I did in Chicago *sigh* I think we are going to turn the place down, but whatever, I guess its good to look at things. I've been spending too much time looking for apts, and I think that 3 bedrooms are close to non-existent in LA. Well, 3 bedrooms that accept pets. Thankfully we aren't in a time crunch yet.

After that, I went to lunch in boys town. It was seriously me and about 100 guys in this little sidewalk area. I loved it... even though I knew they were all gay, it was fun. I even witnessed one get hit on. Being that it was my first time seeing a guy get hit on, it was a nice change to see it... I don't know what I'm trying to say, its not making sense. But anyway, I had lunch at this place called Tops, it was a "healthy" burger place. And everything was so good! I couldn't believe the fries weren't actually deep fried and that my burger had like 1/3 the fat, that just made me so happy! Then I came home and worked out with Mr. Billy Blanks and Miss Mari Windsor. Steph and I had planned on going out tonight since she's back to days, but she was tired, so we watched Pulp Fiction instead. I remember hating it the first time i saw it, but maybe I was just too young, but I kinda liked it this time around. And definately got a lot more of the jokes! And the soundtrack is pretty cool too.

I'm really missing all of my music that is on my old computer, who Best Buy hasn't sent back to me yet! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR

I downloaded a remix of Bloc Party's Banquet tonight. Who would have thought to remix Bloc Party? Well, I like it.

Kevin is starting to do Thursday nights at Spider Club this Thurs, and I can't wait!!

I haven't decided if I'm gonna go to Alk3 tomorrow night. I'm thinking probably not b/c I need my nightly workout to help me relax. Next time, boys! I found out that Head Automatica is playing here next week. i definately am going to try to make it to that one, not sure about which one though- either them headlining or them with Finch. I'm not digging Finch's new cd, so probably the headlining show, if I make it back from Pomona in time.

Gotta go pick up my new license plates tomorrow! Weeeeeeeeeeeeee

You live and you burn

2005-07-17T23:32:00.000-07:00

I bought a new computer this week. Did I already talk about that? I think I did. I decided that the blog doesn't help from getting rid of my thoughts. I wish I could shut my brain off, I really, really do. I can't study, I can't concentrate, hell, even when I'm running my mind is going crazy! I need to find something that can take me away from my brain, its like a flashbook going at warped speed. I know people laugh when I tell them that I think I have a.d.d., but I really do think I have it! My bro has it, my mom thinks she has it, so it wouldn't be too far off it I did.

I think I mentioned that Steph's lot was turned into Charlie and the Choc Factory. I can't believe I haven't updated in a week, I honestly don't know what I've been doing! Anyway, when she came home, she woke me up so she could show me all
the candy and cool shit she got. Hollywood is crazy that they spend
money turning a studio lot into a candy playland! She said she kept
going back to eat more, like dunking marshmallows under the chocolate
waterfalls and stealing nerds off the nerd trees, she even said they
had a chocolate river! She brought me Marshmallow Cocoa body butter
that smells so good I want to eat it! And they know that! It says on
the tub, "smells good enough to eat, but this product is not edible!"
Bastards. I also got a tub of lipgloss, made by hard candy that is in
the shape of a lollipop, so cute. And I think I'm going to go steal
her purple hostess cupcake things later! Thank god I don't like sugar
that much or I'd be rockin back and forth in the corner right now
twitching from a sugar high!

I picked up my guitar again last night. I haven't in like 3 weeks, so so bad. I think I somehow got better though! I played a F chord correctly for the first time ever. I was so proud of myself. Steph and I watched Orgazmo. It was written by the dudes that do South Park. However, I thought Orgazmo sucked. Oh well.

I need sushi!!! I haven't had any in like 3 weeks. My brother got sick off of it the other day. He's alergic to salmon, so he thought he'd try the eel. Well, ends up he's allergic to eel too. I was so proud of Brit for trying sushi while she was here, and I think she was proud of herself too... until I told her that she ate eel. Then she was just disgusted.

In other Brit news... (a different one obviously)
Brit, no, just NO! You almost look like Courtney Love, my god!

You look better when you are playing white trash!

But mostly I miss old Britney:

And as for Kelly, I love you dearly. I think you are so talented that I actually refer to you as "The Kelly." But please, fire your stylist!

I got a few spiderwebs tonight. And I killed a spider the other night. He decided it would be cool to crawl on me while I was doing my Pilates. Notice to other spiders- so not cool, you're friend died b/c of it! I hate spiders so so so so much if you haven't gotten that by now. I had a dream the other night that this ummmm, cute boy was going to kiss me and he opened his mouth and there was a tarantula in there. I think I'm scarred for life! Dear stupid dream- "You're on your own my little nightmare, you cannot stay here!"

I never once saw a spider in my apt in Chicago. I'm not saying they don't exist in Chicago, I'm just saying I would like to live in a place that is not a shit hole and where the owner did not leave 500 spider webs everywhere. I found out that my oldest friend, Mike (no seriously, I'm pretty sure he was my first friend), might be moving into my apt in Chicago. I told him that he has to let me stay with him when I come home.

The person who wrote Harry Potter (the new book) made $36 million this weekend. Wow, thats truely insane! Add that to my list of things to be: an author. That might already be on there, I can't remember. But I do want to write a book, I think it'd be fun. This isn't the first thought I've had of it. Oh, I also want to start a magazine. A REAL magazine, not like the one I run now. Which I haven't done any work on in oh, about over a year. Whoops :)

I need a segment called: Things I wanna know. In this installment-
When did finding a boyfriend/girlfriend on the internet become a socially acceptable thing to do?
I guess I'm just too old fashion.

Does anyone wanna go see Alkaline Trio with me on the 20th?
Or Good Charlotte on Aug 13th at Avalon?
No? No one? Ok, I will go by myself :(

I dunno... I'm out.

ps- HI LAURA!

I'm young and I'm hopeless, lost and I know this

2005-07-11T00:04:00.001-07:00

This is the first day since arriving in LA that I didn't leave my apartment building. I tried to do homework, but got frustrated and quit. I ended up watching Sweet Home Alabama and BJ's DVD about.... um 3 times. And played on the internet endlessly. Boo, I suck. I looked at W's accessory trends for fall and I definately thought 99% of it was hideous. I am however, dying for last season's tulle Jimmy Choo boots. I can't even find a pic of them anywhere! Sara told me her store in Chicago sold out of them pretty much as soon as they were put on the shelves. I wonder how much it would be to get a pair of shoes custom made. I'd get em in both hot pink tulle and black tulle like the Jimmy Choo's. I think I would want mine to have an underneath part tho unlike Jimmy's which were bare. I also want the Chloe snakeskin bag. Lindsay Lohan has it, I think if I see her on the street one day with it, I will take it and run. Her head would be too heavy for her body to carry while running, so I think I'd be in the clear. Just kidding, love the Lohan.

I saw pics of Brit and Kevin at the premiere of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory today. The girl is HUGE! She has to be carrying twins, has to be! I can't not in any frame of mind fathom being pregnant so young. My mom tells me I'm selfish, but if thats what selfish is, then I'm happy to be! No pets for me, and definately no children... until atleast 30.

All the packages I've had delivered here keep getting send back b/c my name isn't on the buzzer. So lame, complicates my life. Speaking of complications, have to call best buy tomorrow to see whats up with my computer. I hate their computer department more than anything else, ever.

There is a bird that is always singing right outside our window at about midnight every night. I thought birds were supposed to sing in the morning. Well, ends up mating call time for birds in Cali is midnight. Maybe there are bird bars up there somewhere and thats the time they close. So its like everyone standing on Hollywood and Vine waiting for their cars, but really just loving chatting with all the drunk people you didn't run into inside. In Chicago, there are bars that stay open til 4am, but not out here! No last chance bars for the LA kids, which kinda sucks b/c I'm definately not ready to go home at 2am, especially b/c last call is at 1:30. That's one thing I found that I didn't like out here, besides the drivers. My bro says when he comes to visit he wants to go to a rave. Um, what??!?!?!? I don't think either of us, nor any of my friends are rave type people, I wouldn't know how to find one, and I'm pretty sure they don't exist out here, only in NYC. But maybe I'm wrong. Even if we did find one and went, I'm pretty sure I would shoot myself b/c of all the shitty techno music. I seriously can't stand the stuff. I'd have to say the funnest music to dance to is stuff that everyone knows. Like Britney's Toxic, Madonna's Like a Prayer or Prince's 1999. Just fun music that everyone can sign and groove to. Add that to my list of things to do, open up a cool bar. I think Dave Navarro and Tommy Lee just opened up Rokbar here in LA. Might have to check that out, I bet it'd play good music. Kinda like Rockit in Chicago, but better?

Terri told me I need to write down everything I want to do b/c everyday its something different. I might have mentioned this already. Well, within the past little while the things added are: Open up cool bar that plays good music and doesn't close at 2am, Be a photographer, Open own boutique to sell own designs, Be a DJ but more like just guest DJ once in awhile, and then there's the constant- become a rockstar. I've been trying to get my girls to start a band with me for forever, but they are all too boring. I'm always regretting the fact that I was raised to believe you go to college, and then get a job where you work for the rest of your life sitting behind a desk. Thats such crap! I wasted so much time b/c of that. I don't want to be stuck behind a desk, I'll go crazy! I need some sort of creative outlet, I wanna take some chances! I know my parents just wanted the best for me and didn't want me to have to work with my hands like they did. I just don't know how to go about starting anything. I've pretty much made up my mind that I do not want to do what I went to school for. I was reading an article the other day in Elle about pretty much the same thing and the advice chic said to go on craigslist's job site and just put in a search with things your interested. I think the girl liked to read and sew, so thats what she entered. Can you imagine being paid for reading at sewing? Well, ok I can, but only in the form of sweatshop worker or someone who works in publishing. But still, I think they came up with 600 hits. Thats crazy. What would my search be? Rockstar fashion photography music? Right, right.

Ok for real tomorrow, have to get on track. Tomorrow is Monday so its the start to a new week, the best time to start being good.

Goals for tomorrow: Run, study, practice guitar, call best buy, call UPS, call parents. Not bad. Maybe I should put an internet time limit on myself too...

I forgot, Steph told me that they turned her lot into Charlie and the Chocolate Factory complete with chocolate river and trees made of nerds and all that kinda stuff. She said she's going to be coming home tonight with a shit-load of candy. Thank god I'm not too much of a sweets freak. I just hope there are no pink laffy taffys b/c I love those!

Singing my life with his words

2005-07-10T00:00:00.000-07:00

Lauren should get over and it and get the Fugees back together... And get a new haircut while she's at it.

I did nothing today. Nothing. I got up, read a magazine, watched half of Legally Blonde with Steph, showered (and shaved, i guess that was a good accomplishment), ate, went to the grove to study but just ended up reading magazines, and came home. Atleast when I fail I won't be surprised.

Steph went to some show tonight with people she works with. I need a job so I can start meeting some people. I thought that would happen in class, but no, everyone was a loser. The one girl I made friends with is moving back to San Diego and the other one is married. I thought she was like 22, but she's 27. Damn those asians for being so ageless.

I've wanted to do nothing but eat the last few days, I hope that ends soon. Or else all my goodness for the last month will go down the drain. Is it so hard to just become rich by doing nothing?!

The more I read the fashion mags and look at all the runway shows online, the more I wish I could do something in fashion. Don't get me wrong, music is by far my first and greatest love, but fashion is so fun and cool! If I could be a famous musician, then I could have my own clothing line. All the cool kids are doing it these days! Honestly though, I used to dream of being able to have my own line a long time ago. Before it got cool for everyone and their mother to have one. I know that sounds like such bullshit, like Hi, I invented the internet. But, I'm seriously not kidding.

I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm excited for the slouchy suede boots this fall! I saw some girl wearing em in bright blue the other day and stopped her to tell her how much I loved them. Two years ago I would have barfed on her feet. Barf is such a vile word, but whatever. I also want those cool pearl strands by Chanel, sported often by Mischa Barton.

Speaking of Mischa, Rachel was on Terri's plane on the way to LA from Chicago. Her and Zach Braff sat in first class together. I found out tonight that they are shooting a movie together in Madison, WI. So random. Anyway, Terri said she's about 4' 9'' in person and about 90 lbs. She sucks. Just kidding, I think she's beautiful, I really do.

I took Terri to the best Mexican place we've found so far and while we are sitting there eating and chatting, Terri randomly goes "Jessica Simpson, I'm not fucking kidding." I was like "what *thinks to myself terri's had too many margaritas*" And she repeats herself and looks off behind me. So I turn around to see another minature girl in the form of Jessica Simpson. She was super cute, and Nick was HOTT! They were with grandparents and her mom and Ashlee and Ray and Braxston showed up soon after. Nick and Jessica acted like a normal couple would, he had his arm around her and stuff even though they were hidden in a back booth, so I really hope the rumors of a breakup aren't true. When we got out back, Nick was parked right next to me, and despite being about 1/2 a foot away, did not hit my car, thanks Nick! haha, I'm such a geek. Ashlee also doesn't drive her own car, so lame. I love driving, I'd never let a dude chauffer me everywhere. We also saw Kathy Griffith sometime over the weekend, she looks like a completely different person without makeup on and not in a good way.

Steph informed me that Hilary Duff is going to be filming an AOL Sessions thing at her studio on Monday. Don't you have to be able to sing live to do that? I guess not, thank god for the awesome engineers at Steph's studio! Maybe she will bring me home one of Hil's picks. HAHAHAHAHAHA Ok, shouldn't laugh too hard, the girl has it made and I don't, so maybe I'm just jealous. I would love to be 17 again! For sure. Wow, the things I'd do differently. Hil has terrible taste in shoes though. As does Jessica Simpson. All the pics I see of them, I'm like you've got to be kidding. They obviously have never heard of the notion that just b/c its expensive, doesn't make it cute! Hear that Ash, the girl with the Mercedes G-Wagen that looks like a box on wheels?

I decided I needed to start talking more pictures, b/c honestly I'm such a picture geek, I love them so much, i think I wanna start another site and do concert pics, mostly black and whites. I havent come up with a name yet, I was thinking something like momentcaptured.com? Or something that has to do with stills... Anyway, I took a bunch today and they all turned out really cool. Most were of the instruments in our apt, shot from cool angles, and then I took some on the way to the Grove, one of a palm tree out my sunroof, one down the line of palm trees going down the street, and one of the Santa Monica Blvd sign, and one when I got my sucker stuck to my steering wheel haha. I think they all turned out good, so I will put them up when I get my comp back!

Im gonna try and go to bed now so I can maybe get up at a decent hour tomorrow and hopefully get a run in! Night :)

We're falling a part to half time

2005-07-08T23:40:00.000-07:00

I forgot- Warped. It sucked. Terrible set up, overcrowded, not that many good bands... the worst thing imaginable- they didnt sell beer!!! How the hell did they expect us to make it through the day! No, seriously, what the fuck?!?!?!?! Not to mention that mapquest sucks and we got totally lost. We got in for free but the after party blew. It was about 10 degrees out after being burnt in the sun during the day and by the time we acquired beer, we were all shivering and couldn't even hold them. Bert has a little belly now, I wanted to pet it. Anyway, we decided to skip the other two dates that we were supposed to go to b/c Long Beach sucked so bad. The Highlight- Fall Out Boy obviously. They closed the show, they have so much energy, I wish I could bottle it and sell it. On their day off, they recorded a live AOL session thing at Steph's studio. I came home and she had left me a note about how she brought me home some "gifts"- they were fob guitar picks, she's so cute. I love my roomie.

ps- the keith richards flowers have died, they look more like him now. im so mean, sorry keith!

Baby, have you got enough gas? Oh yeah!

2005-07-08T23:12:00.000-07:00

Gas is crazy high out here in LA, and having two friends in town, I was going through it like water. Friends gone, car happy.

For all none of you that have been wondering where I've been- my computer died. I was hiding from Terri while she was trying to take a picture of me pre-shower and accidentally knocked over a glass of water, right into my laptop. Excellent time for that to happen! Not. I'm fucked. I brought it in to best buy as soon as I could and haven't heard back from them yet. Shit, shit, shit.

I'm completely and utterly obsessed with Almost Famous. After watching it for the millionth time the other night, I decided I finally needed to go out and get the soundtrack. So, I got up early today and made my way over to mecca, I mean Ameoba. That place is so amazing. I picked up Prince- Greatest Hits, Almost Famous Soundtrack, and The Cure- Greatest Hits, yeah I know it has another name, but I can't think of it right now, and that one was a replacement b/c my friend in Chicago I loaned it to decided to never give it back even though I asked for it like 100 times. Oh well, CD replaced, me happy.

I am currently learning how to use a Mac. I don't think I've used once since 2nd grade. Is it sad that I remember computers pre-windows? Yes, yes it is, I'll shut up now. Anyway, they aren't as hard to use as I originally thought. Maybe I will get one after I spill the next glass of water in my computer. That shouldn't be for another year though, I seem to have about a 2 year computer life span. I think I'm seriously the biggest waste of money. Speaking of... I got some good deals tonight though! Well, unnecessary, but still good! I dropped Brit off at the airport, came back to the hood, decided I wanted Quizno's, parked 2 blocks away from it, and wandered on over there. I passed this little jewelry/beanie baby boutique (seriously, beanie babies, what? its 2005). It had the cutest shit in the window, so I wandered on in. They have tons of trendy stuff, but at super cheap prices, it was like that little ahhhhhhhhhh noise with the light coming down from heaven came on when I walked in. Anyway, I bought two necklaces, the really long ones like I was talking about in one of my early posts, and two bracelets. The owners were so nice they threw in a free hair claw and some suckers! I consider it a success.

I vaccuumed our apartment today, which pretty much hasn't been done since we moved in. It looks like a whole new place! It's unbelievable what a little cleaning will do. I was on such a roll that I took the broom out and knocked down all the spider webs. Don't ask, I learned it from my short grandmother. Jenni stopped by today to pick up her mail. She told Steph and I we can stay til Sept 1, unlike the original Aug 15, but said we will have to be out like 2 days early so she can clean. Clean? HA! This place is going to be cleaner when we move outta here than it was when we moved in! On a better note, she tuned my guitar while she was here! Yay! I really need to learn how to do that myself. Or con Jesse into coming over more often. Here Jesse, come get the beer!! This way, right over to the guitar... haha Or I really just need the Michaelane boys back, I knew there was a reason I wanted to keep them. Other than to amuse me.

Class is over, I'm so in trouble. Test is in like 17 days, and I've spent like 1 day studying, I suck so bad!

For those of you that know me, know I have a little obsession. For purposes of talking about him and still trying to sound like a sane person, I'm going to call him BJ on here. Hmmm, maybe I shouldn't, but whatever, that unimportant. I found out BJ is going to be in Chicago next week. Dammit! I move to LA, he goes to Chicago. Screw him. Well... just, nevermind. Grr, makes me wish I was back in Chicago for a day or two.

I need a get rich quick scheme. I was reading the Hollywood Reporter the other day and someone stole my wireless cable tv idea. Dammit! How much can you sell babies for on the black market? Ummm, kidding?

Steph and I tried to hit up a new Mexican Restaurant last night. We wanted to try out Velvet Margarita, but once we got into the area, saw that a amovie was being filmed and pretty much all the parking was blocked off. So, I decided we should try this place on Santa Monica that I'd seen, "Fiesta Cantina." I didn't know it was possible to have a gay Mexican Restaurant, and I definately didn't know there was a boys town in LA. Ahh, the things you learn. The food sucked, but the entertainment was priceless. We got there right at the end of happy hour, which obviously many of the patrons had been there for. Dancing with each other or individually to artists like Madonna, Gloria Gaynor, Prince ensues... I laughed for a long while, all the boys were so entertaining.

There's a new Abercrombie billboard on Sunset that is quite... pornographic. Well, for public. It just shows the lower half of a guy dressed in jeans, but he is definately letting it ummmm, show. I guess he's proud! Reminded me of the dude at that Melrose Boutique that gave Steph a lap dance and proceeded to show us that he doesn't like to tuck b/c he's proud of what he's got. Well... yeah, I would be too if I were a dude... or if he were straight.

I think that's enough. I should be back more now that I know how to use a Mac. Go me *dances off like an ipod ad*

Discover me discovering you

2005-06-29T19:07:00.000-07:00

Its been a week since Brit got here, and I have to say its been a crazy, crazy week. As I mentioned, we went to get her a fake. That in and of itself was an experience. I know now that I will never go to Tijuana. I was scared enough leaving my car for 5 minutes in the area where we went to get her i.d. I talked to my mom this morning and told her I was sick. She suggested I take a little trip over the border to get myself some meds. #1- nice of my mom to suggest that! #2- I told her that my car would be gone as soon as I drove over the border and I don’t really feel like dealing with a missing car anytime soon. Speaking of cars, Steph got into her first accident yesterday. We were on our way home from guitar center (more on that in a bit), she was stopped at a red light and some dude in a rental Jaguar decided to switch lanes, didn’t check his blindspot and drove right into her. I’m glad she had the guys with her, but she also said that the dude that hit her was really nice, so they exchanged info and now she just had to get it fixed. Who knows when she will find time to do that, yesterday was her first day off in 20 days! Crazy, crazy, but she gets cool benefits from her job, like ya know, having Keith Richards buy her the most insanely gorgeous, not to mention expensive, bouquet of long-stem red roses. She looked up the florist on the internet only to find that they did all the flowers for Paul McCartney’s wedding. We figured her bouquet has to be well over $200. Crazy I tell ya. We took a pic of them b/c we are geeks like that haha

Brit’s friend Pete Elite was in town on Monday night b/c he is managing this band from Chicago called Michaelane. We went to see their show at the Cat Club before heading over to Metal Skool. They couldn’t use their own equipment, so the sound was shitty, but the guys were super nice and didn’t have a place to stay, so they crashed on my floor. I think we stayed up til about 6am hanging out. And after lounging by the pool for a bit the next day, we all trooped over to Guitar Center so that Nate could buy some drum sticks. They found out they didn’t have to load into their show til 10:40, so we came back to my apartment where they all took turns playing the piano and guitar. It was so awesome. I got a little taste of what Steph said was a constant at Berklee, kids just sitting around playing instruments and jamming. I loved every minute of it. Oh, and at guitar center I played my first electric!!! Some guy walked past me and was like
”Rocker chic, cool!” and I wanted to squeal and be like yes, someday!! But I just smiled. And of course I had to play one of the more expensive guitars, some dude that worked there tried to sell it to me and I was like Ha! I couldn’t afford $2500 for a guitar even if I made Brit stand on the corner for a few nights. So, I reluctantly put it down :(

Tonight we are heading down to Anaheim to watch Michaelane play at the House of Blues, Disney. Then I think we are going to crash with Brit’s friend Danielle who lives down in that area or the guys in their hotel room b/c there’s no sense in driving back up to LA when we have to be in San Diego for Warped tomorrow. Eeeeee, I’m so excited for Warped! And for tomorrow in general b/c Terri comes in! Yay!!!!! I can’t wait to see her, I miss her!

Oh, Brit and I went to this play that Allysa and Danielle were bartending at this past Sunday night. It was in the backyard of this guys house, Luke and JJ were in the play a bit, but it was more just a monologue of this dude and his thoughts. The play was written by the guys who used to write for Jackass, they were both really cool and funny. The play was hysterical, well what I saw of it anyway. The bar was free wine, and although we hadn’t had dinner, Brit decided she was super drinking woman and had 4 glasses of wine in about an hour. Keep in mind this is a girl that doesn’t drink that often. So by the time intermission came around, she was swaying. About 5 mins later, she was puking in the bathroom, and then the kitchen sink, and then the front yard. So, I had to take her home. There was this video camera set up in front of the bar area where people could stand and give their thoughts and comments on the play. Well, when we saw Luke on Monday at Metal Skool, he said theres this part where Brit walks up to the camera, says like half an incoherent sentence and then uses the camera as her mirror to start fixing her hair. Hahaha, I can’t wait to see it, they said they are going to use it as a screen cap for the DVD. Too funny. Well, not the puking part, but she’s still alive, so I told her to chalk it up to a learning experience, everyone goes through it!

Ok, I’m at Starbucks on Robertson, but should head home to do some online apartment hunting and get ready for tonight/tomorrow. I am truly appreciative of the no smoking in doors in California, but I’m sitting outside and totally downwind of this dude smoking. Think its possible to ban smoking completely? Am I too much of a wishful thinker? There was this place next door to the cat club that supposedly sells marijuana for medicinal purposes. They give you the number of this Dr. to go see who will prescribe it to you, and then you go pick it up at this store. There were so many people coming in and out of there, all the band boys kept cheering for the guys coming out haha I just will never understand the allure of smoking weed, but that’s ok, to each their own, right? Except for smoking, no one do that! When I have my own country smoking will definitely be illegal. Me and like two other people will live there, but that’s ok.

I’m sad that I didn’t get to see my little crush boy before he left  He’s gone for a month, but I guess that’s better, so I can concentrate on studying.

Not really celeb sightings for the week: Jason Biggs (twice, he’s stalking me), Bo Bice, Constantine from American Idol, some dude from Disturbed who got on stage to sing with Metal Skool, some chic from one of the Real World shows, Jay from Project Runway who I totally made an ass of myself in front of b/c I was like I recognize him, maybe I know him, so I stared, and then laughed and said hi, and he said hi and I ran away haha. Joe supposedly saw Tarah Reid in front of my apt building but I wasn’t out there, oh well. I want Steph to take me on a tour of her studio so I can see some Stones!!!

We close our eyes, pretending to sleep

2005-06-24T19:37:00.000-07:00

Quick update b/c I have to get ready. We are going to some bar called Tokio or Tokyo tonight, its by Beauty Bar. Meeting up with Alyssa, Luke, Airin, yay, I love meeting new people!

So far the trip of Brit has flown. I never, ever thought I'd be going through the experience of fake id acquiring ever again in my life, but... well, yeah. Sketch, sketch, sketch.

Me, Brit and Steph (who magically got the afternoon off yesterday) decided to hit up Melrose to do some shopping. We first went to Trashy Lingerie, and then to Agent Provacatuer, then to the cheapie shops. I got two new pairs of sunglass, and some thigh high fishnets, which are really hott. Brit got a belt, sunglasses, and some pants. Steph made out big with sunglasses, and 4 items off the 2 for $10 rack. Yay for cheap shopping!

Hit up Beauty Bar for like .5 seconds last night, saw some chic who I think was on some old real world, dont really know, don't really care. Basque was hopping, I definately wanna hit up that place soon, prolly some night that Kevin is promoting.

We laid by the pool for a little bit the past two days, and I think I don't wanna get any darker, I finally look like the Italian I am!

Later :)

Summer air reminds me of...

2005-06-21T23:04:00.000-07:00

Spider web count tonight= 5. Spiders=0. Awesome.

I consider myself a very good friend, but while I was wandering around the hood, I got to thinking of the people I have to get back to, and it seems each day the list gets a little longer. List to self:
Call back- Angie, Sara
Email- Jess, Laura, Heather, Regan

Thanks for the email, Jess. Haha

I have this little game I play with myself when I don't feel like working out. I tell myself that I'm just gonna go on a nice little easy walk. B/c I know once I get going, my endorphins will kick in and I'm get my booty movin. This usually works, but tonight I was feeling really lazy and wasn't going to go at all. That is until my roomate got a call that an old "friend" was coming to visit her. She told me I could stay, but obviously I was like no, I'll give you your privacy. I didnt want her to have to be quiet on my account! Haha... so, I went for my run, and stayed out longer to give her some time. More good came of this vistor, other than I got off my ass, there has been a bottle of grey goose donated to the apartment, woohoooo! Hahahahaha, oh man

I got my car washed today. I love going on the little motorized belts that drag you through the wash, they really excite me for some reason. So now my car is nice n shiny n clean. All ready for Brit's dirty ass to mess it up! ;)

I hardly ever listen to the radio, b/c lets not lie, its crap. So, when I got done with class today, get in and turned on my car, I figured it was a cd that was playing when Rancid's Ruby Soho came streaming through my speakers. Then I remember that I no longer even own that cd, and it was the radio playing. The DJ dude then started talking about how the Transplants CD came out today. I have to go pick that up asap, so it can make me more excited for Warped! Brit informed me that we are hitting up the Anaheim date too. I think that makes for 4 total warped dates for me. Thats a lot! I'm actually not that excited about this years, there aren't too many bands that I'm excited about. I wanna see The Transplants (my ipod tonight was flooding me with Rancid, I love Tim's voice and can't wait to hear it live again), Fall Out Boy, My Chemical Romance, and ummmmm wow, is that it? Oh, MXPX, and I think that Mest might be on one of the dates we're going to. I hope so, I haven't seem them in so long. I'm not sure if they are still here in LA recording or not, but I can't wait for their new cd. I loved the last one, but was disappointed in its sales. I hope this one is better for them. Come on John, you can do it!

So, when I came back in tonight, my roomie and the boy left to go get a late dinner, and I sat down to regain my breath and play on the internet a bit. I came across some pics and all the sudden, my mood was shot. Nothing particularly bad about the pics or anything, but I hate that can't control what makes me sad. Although I try and reverse it with things that make me happy... but sometimes that just doesn't work. These couple of pics just made a sad mood roll on in. Maybe b/c they made me realize that some of the things I want in life I will never have. And that some people really do have it made, and I am not one of them. Not that my life is shit, b/c its so not, but I really think the saying is true- You always want what you can't have. Mick likes to say "You can't always get what you want" which is true too. Speaking of the Stones, they are having a listening party tomorrow at the studio. I wanna go! Steph is so funny, she said they dragged in all these speakers for it and they looked all bare and stuff, so she started decorating and now its all spiffed up. Haha, hope Mick and the boys enjoy your work, Steph! My roomate is just too cute, I've renamed her Squirt :)

Oh, so, if you haven't figured it out, I name my posts with lyrics. Tonights came b/c while I was out on my run, it was a bit steamy out, and got me reminiscing about summer nights hanging out with my crew, usually at some bar. But, not only that, I got kinda nostalgic for those nights I would come in at 2, usually drunk, and I'd make or receive that call from that person (ok persons, but nevermind that) for a late night.... um, night cap :) I miss that. Oh well... The weather just reminded me of good times and good nights (and better late nights). There's a pool right outside my back porch, and when the lights come on it at night it makes me really wanna drag a boy in there with me and... yeah.

I think I'm going to try and hit the sack early tonight so I can get my workout over in the morning before class and the infamous Brit gets here. Night.

I know you better than you fake it

2005-06-21T12:42:00.000-07:00

I slept way too late today. I woke up at 8, went back to sleep and woke up at 11. That sucks, big time.

This girl is such a natural beauty, I never understood my Mischa got all the attention, I think Rachel is much prettier.

This is supposedly Hil on the set of her new vid- just wtf, oh god:

Joel was spotted on set too, but...

Cute pic, however, I think I'm the one person on earth who hated this movie. Why? Because it made me cry. I don't like crying. If I could have my tear ducts sealed off, I totally would.

I wasn't a fan of this boy at first, maybe b/c I saw the movie Donnie Darko, just so not my type of movie. Well, seems lately that nothing is my type of movie. I want to see Mr. and Mrs. Smith and Madagascar and thats about it. I agree with aol that stars are taking over movies- in the sense that whos in a movie is more important than the movie itself. (insert death stares at TomKat here) Anyway, what is it about water that makes a man's hottness factor go up like a million? I don't know, but Jake+surfing=me drooling. Heather should like this pic too:

And a hot pic of Terri's fav man:

Wow.

Brit's plane comes in at 6 tomorrow which means I'm going to have to go straight from class to the airport... during rush hour traffic. Maybe I'll see someone get shot! That hasn't happened in like a month, right? Anyway, she informed me that we are indeed going out tomorrow night. These next three weeks with her here are going to be a whirlwind, I just know it. I'm not going to get shit done, I'm going to spend way too much money, but... I'm going to have a blast, and I can't wait. Maybe she just won't go back to Chicago.

Speaking of Chicago, Billy Corgan supposedly wants to get the Smashing Pumpkins back together again. Guess he took out a full page ad in the Trib. Isn't he putting out a solo album sometime soon, like really soon? I guess maybe he feels as if the solo career just isn't taking off like he thought it would. Granted it took him about 10 years to figure that out, but ya know, whatever. I wish him the best of luck and always have. Just as I do anyone from Chicago :) (ps- I love Vince Vaughn, Jeremy Piven, John Cusack...)

I unblocked everyone on my buddylist b/c I figure I'm grown up and blocking people is kinda childish. But, now there's this dude writing me, I don't know if I know him, and he won't tell me who he is... so thats weird. I refuse to talk to him.

Lady Democrat: I moved to LA b/c I want to work in the entertainment business and its obviously much more happening in LA than in Chicago. Sorry if my posts come off as me hating LA. I don't, so far I love it, just not its drivers! :) haha Move here, you'll love it. Unless you aren't into big cities or going out and that kinda stuff.

Shit, running late again... later!

Im two quarters and a heart down, and I don't wanna forgot how your voice sounds

2005-06-20T21:37:00.000-07:00

My roommate, Stephanie, works at a recording studio. She just started, so is at the bottom of the totem pole- she’s a runner. Anyway, her first week there, some Sugar Ray dude sent her to buy a chocolate cake with white frosting. It took her a couple of stores, but she found it. Like any normal rockstar, he proceeded to not take one bite of it. The cake, which is about 1 x 2 feet, ended up on our kitchen counter. It stayed there for about 2 weeks, until yesterday when I noticed it had grown some lovely green fuzz. On my way out the door, juggling my books, bag, keys, and this giant sized cake, I came to one of the finer parts of my building known as the stairs to the garbage dumpster. Someone had spilled syrup down the stairs, from the top floor, all the way to the basement. Did they clean it up? No, of course not, who in their right mind would do that? That part I found funny though, is that they took the time to make and put up signs on each floor warning people to watch out for the spilled syrup. Haha. Thank you Mr. Tooktimetomakesignsbutnotcleanyour spill, I salute you. I proceeded to step in it the whole way down to the garbage room and attract nice sized trees on the bottom of each of my flip-flops. Awesome.

Ashlee went back to blonde, looks better than that odd brownish color she'd been sporting lately.

Speaking of hair, this color is so hot on her:

Here's hott hair and that necklace:

On my run tonight, I only enountered two spider webs, yay! But my shins are killing me :(

I tried looking for an apartment today, but it consisted of me driving around, gawking at awesome buildings I could never afford and chatting on the phone with my friends. I suck. Terri bought my shoes (i cant find a pic, but they are these hott silver, lace-up espadrilles wedges), she's so not going to regret it, those shoes rock. They're unbelievably comfy for being 4 inches, I think I've worn them like 5 times already. Ally is in FL for another week and is sad that she won't have any color to show for her 4 weeks there. The real world sucks! Atleast she will get to relax a bit.

OK, roomie and I are going to watch Zoolander now. This movie reminds me of Ally and I can hear her reciting the lines... oh man

Lost, so lost, I'm lost at sea, you see.

2005-06-20T02:13:00.000-07:00

I cant sleep- enter blog #2 of the day.

Brit went to warped milwaukee today. I got texts, I'm not sure what to think, I think that I'm thinking "uh oh."

I have a love/hate relationship with the foliage here in Cali, well atleast the part of it I encounter on my exercising route. On the one hand, its all so lush and pretty, there's this one yard I pass that is filled with oversized leafy bushes and these trees that have flowers so big that they droop down, I've never seen anything like them, they're so cool, I promise to take pics soon. On the other hand, there are some bushes which are so thick that they grow out really close to the sidewalk causing me to get a lovely face full of spiderweb once in a while. That I could definately do without. If I get a spider to the hair, I know I'll freak. God help anyone who is within viewing distance if this ever occurs. I think I got 3 spider webs tonight, no spiders, therefore I will consider my little jaunt a success.

Brit and I were at Blockbuster some time ago, trying to rent a a video, a VHS video. I didnt have a dvd player at my place in Chicago, and the Blockbuster obviously didnt care b/c it only carried dvds. Anyways, not the point, the point was that we came across Hilary Duff's live concert dvd, named, what else "Girl Can Rock." Ok, hold that... there's this chic in LA that makes custom made stillettos in which people can get rhinestone letters placed across the front to read whatever they wish- Paris got her's to read "HEIRESS" on each foot. What did Hil get? "ROCK" "STAR" Well, obviously. Ok, to wrap this up, Hilary obviously thinks she's a rock star. Pop star? Yes. Rock star? No. I love Hil, I really do, she's a nice girl. I'm even jealous of her b/c well, let's see, shes 17, loaded, and has more shoes than I could ever dream about having. But, I think she should know her place, and that it doenst contain the title "rock star." Not that she can't become one, she's just not currently there. Along those same lines, I have come across her new single, Wake Up. I read that it was going to be more rock than her other stuff, and to be contain on her upcoming greatest hits cd, I won't go there. Anyway, being produced by the Dead Executives*, I really thought it would be a step up. Upon first listen, I realized it was the same old shit- slow, mellow beats and shitty, shitty lyrics. Nonetheless, my pop loving heart has betrayed me and I now think its a bit catchy. Shoot me.

In other poptart news, Lindsay looked great at her premiere tonight:

Her hair from this night totally makes me wanna rock the side pony tail:

There's a better pic of it somewhere, I'll find it tomorrow, along with the Elle necklace pic.

My building is unusually quiet tonight. I somehow ended up in a building that contains half jewish families and half college students. They aren't half jewish families, its that the building is half full of Jewish families, but you got that, right? Ok... So anyway, during the day, the courtyard is a mess of screaming, crying kids. At night its drunk people breaking shit. I don't have a problem with either group, it just strikes me as such an odd pairing. The manager is this little asian dude and next thing I will learn is that the building is owned by the mob. Mafioso? If you haven't seen Folks!, you must.

Ok last thing, anyone know where I can buy Republic of Tea tea? Other than online? TIA!

*- Dead Excutives- if you havent heard, this is a new producing team of Joel and Benji Madden (Good Charlotte) and John Feldman (Goldfinger)
(I expected better from them!!!!)

Hollywood hills and suburban thrills

2005-06-19T18:21:00.000-07:00

I caved, I got a blog. Its like deja vu myspace all over again. If no one reads this, thats fine by me, I just need some place to spill my thoughts. Ever heard that if you can't sleep, youre supposed to make lists of shit you have to get done, that way you brain can be at ease? No? Well, whatever, thats what I heard. Anyway, I can't study. I try, I sit there with my notes open, highlighter in hand. But, my inner dialogue won't stop running! So, I decided to try the sleeping tactic in another form. Emptying my thoughts so I can study. I'll let you know how it goes. For now, lets begin:

So, I moved to LA about a month ago. LA should come with a warning: LA- where common sense comes to die. I could keep that broad, but for now, I'll be nice and limit it to the drivers/driving ability of those in LA. #1- people dont know how to stay in their lanes, theres been too many times where I have to slow down b/c the person a little ahead of me in the opposite lane decided to make like Kramer and decide to ignore the lines so they can have luxury sized lanes. Just no, stay in your lane, we'll get along better. #2- they like to randomly switch lanes. When someone cuts me off, I don't get mad b/c I figure either someone stopped in their lane and they would like to keep driving, or they realized they have to turn soon, not from the lane they were originally in. If that were the case, I can live with that, hell, I lived and drove in Chicago for how long? Cutting people off is more than ok to me! But, the people in LA seem to have no reason for their moves other than maybe that lane didnt look good on their car anymore and my lane seemed like such a better place to be. And the oddest part is that when I get cut off, I look over to see the other lane empty! So fine, I move over and get ahead of them, whatever people. #3- they drive under the speed limit. When I first got here and wanted to look at everything I passed, I loved this b/c everyone goes so slow anyway! But, now that I know where I'm going and where everything is, for the love of god people, the speed limit is only 35, can we atleast go that ridiculously low speed? When theres 3 lanes and everyone is doing 30, it tends to frustrate me a bit. #4- I realize that I am a person, and you are driving a car, so when I want to cross the street, I will wait for you to drive by before I cross, you don't have to stop in the middle of the street so I can cross. Really, I appreciate it, its nice and all, but its so unnecessary, you slow everyone down behind you. In Chicago, if you try to cross while someone is driving, they will run you down, and thats ok by me, b/c I have common sense and I realize not to cross in front of cars. On the flip side of this, LA expects you to let them cross! I have now been yelled at and flicked off twice b/c I didnt stop for someone who was trying to cross in the middle of the street when cars were coming. WTF? You wait til there are no cars, or until oncoming traffic has a red, and then you cross, why is that such a hard concept to grasp?!?! OMG, ok, I'm done with LA and the driving situation, b/c really, I could go on all day.

Anyone who knows me knows that I'm a popculture whore. I love the sites, the pics, the stories, the mags... everything. However, contrary to what that prior statement would leave you to believe, I could give a rats ass about Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. He's weird, she's akward, they're either dating or pretending to date to draw attention to their movies and or lives. Either way, I don't care and I think they and all the press surrounding them should disappear. Gross.

Did anyone else notice that Linsday Lohan and Kate Hudson are wearing the same necklace in the Elle spread and the In Style spread, respectively? No? I did, and I like it, its by Calvin Klein. I have a thing with really long necklaces right now. Pic of Kate with the necklace (i love her):

Another long necklace I love:

Ummm... today was Father's Day. I called my dad, no one at home picked up. Oh well. I'm talking to little bro right now and apparently dad didnt have the greatest father's day. Oh lord, I will spare you the details. I'm pretty sure this is the first father's day I've ever missed. Makes me nostalgic for canal days, also known as sewer days. Ok, I lied, it doesn't. I'm pretty sure I'll be ok if I never go there again.

I want to do nothing but shop lately, I don't know whats wrong with me. Things I want: everything croc (ok, well shoes and purses), long necklaces, big bangle bracelets, and a pair of new sunglasses although I already have like 10 pairs. Oh, and I want a new jean skirt. And some new flip flops. I love love love all my wedge shoes for spring/summer, but supposedly wedge boots are going to be in this fall, and I'm just not having that. Ill.

I've been having random stomach pains today, don't know whats up with that. Shut up stomach or no food for you! I should go get my run over with... *yawn*

I'm sure I will update later when I'm trying to study. Thanks for not reading! :)